Some Secrets Shouldn't Be Secrets
by precibus
Summary: *4.03 spoiler* Mrs. Hughes is keeping a secret for Anna, but Mr. Carson, Bates and even Lady Mary have noticed a change in Anna, and won't give up until they find out who/what caused it... and once they do find out, what can they do to help Anna find peace?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I own nothing at all related to Downton Abbey –if I did, 4.03 would never have happened. All characters are property of Julian Fellowes and ITV.**

**_(Spoilers if you haven't watched 4.03 yet)_**

Mrs. Hughes watched wearily as the Bates' trudged away from the Abbey. It had been 2 weeks and still Anna turned slightly away from her husband as they walked down the path, appearing curled into herself even as she walked. Not for the first time that fortnight, Mrs. Hughes watched Mr. Bates' hand reach out towards Anna and Anna's almost imperceptible flinch away from him.

_That poor man_, she thought, regretting even more her impulsive vow of secrecy to Anna. At the time it seemed like she had been doing the right thing, but as she watched Mr. Bates grow more and more bewildered about his wife's sudden, unexplainable personality change, she grew more convinced that Mr. Bates would have to be told. But she couldn't go back on her word to Anna. _No one must ever know._

"Mrs. Hughes?" Mr. Carson's voice behind her made her jump, and she turned to find that the last few stragglers had cleared out of the servants' hall.

"Oh, Mr. Carson, you made me jump," she said as lightly as she could. "Is something the matter?"

"Actually," Mr. Carson said, settling himself into one of the chairs, "I believe something is the matter with Anna."

"With Anna?" she repeated, wondering how she could get through this conversation without breaking Anna's confidence.

"Yes, Mrs. Hughes, Anna," Mr. Carson repeated, impatient with her feigned ignorance. "I thought you might know why Anna jumps at every sudden sound, only plays with her food and turns white at any mention of the _boot room_. Mr. Bates came to ask me today, he wondered if you or I had reprimanded Anna –I told him we hadn't, although even if that were the case, that would be no reason for Anna's sudden withdrawal into herself."

"I can't tell you," she said, though she knew that would not stop him from asking. "Yes, something is the matter with Anna, but I promised her I wouldn't tell anyone. She would be mortified if she knew I had told someone."

"What secret could you possibly be keeping for Anna that not even Mr. Bates knows?" Carson pondered aloud. "Mr. Bates is very worried about her, says she's even more subdued and skittish at their cottage than she is here, if that's even possible."

At this, Mrs. Hughes felt even more guilty about her promise of secrecy to Anna. _But whatever horrors Mr. Bates was imagining, they were nothing compared to what that poor girl had endured._

"I came across Anna in a moment of distress and she told me," she explained, hoping that detail would satisfy Mr. Carson. "I promised I would keep her secret for her –she would be mortified if anyone else found out."

"And are we to find out what this secret is eventually?" Mr. Carson persisted, wondering if Anna's sudden change was down to a suspected pregnancy –and if so, whatever was the protocol for a pregnant ladies' maid?

"Not if Anna has anything to do with it," Mrs. Hughes muttered, remembering the terror in Anna's face as she begged her never to tell Mr. Bates or even Dr. Clarkson.

"Mr. Bates did wonder if it had anything to do with that friendly Mr. Green," Mr. Carson went on. "He was afraid Anna might be regretting her wedding vows."

"She doesn't," Mrs. Hughes replied automatically.

"But it does have something to do with Mr. Green?" Carson persisted, noticing that she hadn't denied that part of his query.

"I can't tell you," she repeated, wondering whether he could piece the story together himself.

"But whatever it is, it's enough to have you worried about Anna too," he continued. "Someone or something scared or hurt her so badly that she can't tell Mr. Bates, but was all right for her to tell you. Am I correct?"

"I don't think she'd have told me if she didn't need my help," Mrs. Hughes admitted. "She was adamant that no one must ever know, especially not Mr. Bates."

"_Especially_ not Mr. Bates?" Mr. Carson enquired. "Whyever would Anna keep a secret from Mr. Bates of all people? He adores her!"

Mrs. Hughes stood up to make them both a cup of tea, while Mr. Carson went on ruminating about Anna, Bates and Green. When Mrs. Hughes sat down again, placing a biscuit barrel betweem them, the look on Mr. Carson's face had changed from one of bewilderment to one of determination and –was that pity on Mr. Carson's face?

"Mr. Green hurt Anna," Mr. Carson said as soon as he caught her eye. It wasn't a question. "Hurt her badly enough that it would kill Bates if he found out."

"She's afraid Mr. Bates would kill Mr. Green," Mrs. Hughes corrected him. "And then he would hang."

From the look on Mr. Carson's face, she could see that he understood exactly what had happened.

"_Please_ don't tell Anna that you know," Mrs. Hughes pleaded. "She doesn't want people to know and pity or judge her for it. You know as well as I do that many people would believe it was her fault."

"The bastard," Mr. Carson went on, "that bastard raped our Anna –and she doesn't want him punished for it?"

"She doesn't want anyone to know it happened," Mrs. Hughes repeated.

"Not even his Lordship?" Mr. Carson went on. "If only she had spoken up, that monster would have been arrested, or at least dismissed without a reference!"

"Would you put Anna and Mr. Bates through the torment of a public trial?" Mrs. Hughes replied acidly. Anna was enough of a wreck as it was, subjecting her to public scutiny –even if it were just to his Lordship and Lady Mary –would be too much for her to bear, she was sure.

"Poor Bates," Mr. Carson went on, echoing her earlier sentiments. "He's imagined so many things that could be wrong, but never _this_!"

"If he ever finds out," Mrs. Hughes reminded him. "Anna intends to take this secret to her grave –and we won't go behind her back to tell him. She'd never forgive us!"

"We won't tell him," Mr. Carson agreed, "but eventually Anna will have to tell him. And the thought of that vile Mr. Green getting away with it..."

"As long as he stays away from Downton, I am willing to let the matter die," Mrs. Hughes said reluctantly. "It's far more important to me to get Anna back to us than to chase for justice –and a trial may very well go in his favour."

"I suppose you're right," Mr. Carson had to agree as he stood up to return the biscuit barrel to it's place.

As he and Mrs. Hughes left the servants' hall, both lost in thoughts of Anna and Mr. Bates, Mr. Carson wondered what was happening in Anna and Mr. Bates' cottage. Anna would tell her husband soon, he was sure of that.

One look at Anna's pale, drawn face and Bates' worried look the the next morning told him that Bates was still in the dark.


	2. Chapter 2

**_I own none of the Downton Abbey characters. I'm only borrowing them for a while._**

_Home sweet home, _Bates thought sarcastically as he and Anna entered their cottage. They used to look forward to their time alone here, but now, with Anna actively trying to avoid all contact with him, it seemed far too small to contain them both. Even going through the door, she took great care to avoid even brushing against him.

He reached out to her again, hoping against hope that she would respond, and his heart sank as he watched her take two steps across the room, using the table as a barrier between them. Before, they would sit at that table after they got home from the Abbey: he would read to her while she worked on Lady Mary's mending, they might discuss little improvements they could make to the cottage on their day off, then they would go upstairs together. Not anymore. Ever since the night of the house party, when she'd fainted and hit her head, Anna barely spoke to him, much less touched him or let him even touch her.

She vanished immediately into the bathroom, closing the door securely behind her –another habit she had developed in the past fortnight. Sometimes he wondered whether he should follow her in, ask for an explanation –plead for one, if necessary. Mr. Carson had reassured him that nothing untoward had happened to Anna at work, so her problem had to involve him. _Maybe she didn't only regret the marriage, maybe she'd be happier if he found work away from Downton too, so she wouldn't have to be reminded of the mistake she'd made when she married him?_

As had become her habit, Anna shut the bathroom door behind her, though it hurt her to see the pained look on her husband's face as he resignedly watched her shut the door on him and continued limping slowly towards the table. _It has to be this way. It's better this way,_ she thought, beginning to change with her back to the door, just in case. She knew John would never barge in on her, but ever since Mr. Green, she was starting to doubt everything she had ever known about men.

The bruises on her face had now gone down, but she could see that the ones on her arms, ribcage and legs were still a few days away from fading. One of her left ribs ached painfully as she peeled off her corset and she gritted her teeth to avoid gasping from the pain. That would bring Mr. Bates into the bathroom in a heartbeat, closed door or not –and he just couldn't see her like this.

_You only have to hide yourself for a few more days_, she reminded herself, but truth be told, even the thought of letting him touch her made all the hairs on her body stand on end. She loved John, she knew she did, but she was afraid that instead of John's hands, John's lips on her, she would feel Green's.

She stepped into her nightgown rather than pull it over her head –it hurt her ribs less -and took a deep breath, steeling herself to face John again. He was sitting at the table: book resting on his lap, cane propped against his chair, head bowed.

When he heard the bathroom door squeak open, he turned slowly towards her and she had to stifle a shameful urge to cover herself, to put a barrier between them.

"Anna, please," he began, but she shook her head.

"Not tonight, John, I'm too tired, honestly I am."

"Anna, just tell me what's wrong," he asked, unable to keep the pleading note out of his voice. "I'm not going to push you into anything you're not comfortable with, just please tell me what I've done, or haven't done. Please?"

"Nothing's wrong," she said in a low voice. No matter how many times she'd said that lie over the past 2 weeks, to John, to Mr. Carson, to Lady Mary, even to Ivy and Daisy, it never got any easier to say.

"Goodnight," she said in an even lower voice and started walking up the stairs slowly, hoping he wouldn't follow her.

He didn't follow. She didn't know what was worse, the nights when he followed her upstairs, tried to talk to her and lay next to her as she feigned sleep, or the nights when he didn't come upstairs at all, when he slept downstairs and aggravated his bad leg. She shook her head to clear out the memory of Green calling him "that old cripple" when she thought of John's leg. Those nights were probably the worst, when she had to face the fact that John was willing to sleep on a sofa and be stiff and sore all the next day, simply because he was afraid he had started to repulse her.

John waited at the table for an hour, worrying and wondering. He was afraid Anna wanted a divorce but didn't know how to break it to him... but then he recalled the look in her eyes when she looked at him. It wasn't hatred or disgust, as he had seen in Vera's eyes. It was a desperate, fearful, pleading look, but pleading for what? If she wanted him not to touch her, to approach her for sex, he would respect that, if only she would talk to him.

When he guessed Anna was asleep, or close to it, he climbed slowly up the stairs. Anna was lying with her head buried in the pillow, with only her blonde hair visible. Immediately he noticed that she was only pretending to be asleep. She was lying too still and stiff to be natural, and he thought you could hear an occasional catch in her breath. _What was she crying about?_

Too afraid to put his arms around her –what if she screamed or pushed him away? –he simply climbed into bed, careful to leave as much space as possible between them. Not that that was difficult: Anna had squashed herself into the smallest possible space on her side of the bed, leaving a good three-quarters of it empty for him.

"You know I love you, don't you?" he asked as he lay down. "I would do anything to make you feel better, no matter how badly it hurts me to do it."

When Mr. Bates was asleep, Anna slipped soundlessly out of bed and went back downstairs, where she sat staring unseeingly out of the dark window, tears of pain and fear flowing freely down her cheeks, until Mr. Bates came downstairs in the morning ready for another day of work, where he found her: red-eyed, bone-tired but still unable to speak to him.

**_A/N: Next chapter: someone finds out what happened to Anna. Thank you for the reviews, they make my day!_**


	3. Chapter 3

**_To all my reviewers: Thank you for taking the time to comment on my work, and I'm really glad I'm not the only one unhappy with this season's storyline for Anna and Bates. I have no idea how this will play out on the show, but I hope my take on it may make it easier to watch next Sunday._**

**_Slightly longer chapter than usual this time. _**

**_Usual disclaimer: Nothing in Downton Abbey belongs to me. _**

Watching Anna pick at her breakfast in the servants' hall the next morning, Mr. Carson wondered how he could have missed the signs that something was very wrong with Anna for so long. Even during Mr. Bates' imprisonment, she'd still been able to smile and sometimes join in the banter that went on over breakfast, but now she sat biting her lip, still as a statue, while Mr. Bates shot worried glances at her.

None of this had escaped the notice of the other servants, of course. Thomas made jibes about Anna's newfound lack of interest in food which earned him a series of glares from Bates, and as she cleared the plates away, Daisy asked Anna in a low voice if she was sure she was okay.

"Mr. Carson," a voice jolted him out of his reverie, and he noticed that Anna and Ivy were standing next to him –with Anna keeping more of a distance than she normally would.

"Yes, Ivy?"

"I just wanted to remind you, that is, if it's okay, for me and Anna to swap half-days this week?" Ivy asked haltingly.

"It's fine with me, Mr. Carson," Anna said. "I promised I would, and Ivy deserves a bit of a treat anyway."

Of course. That dratted theatre trip with James. Well, he couldn't reasonably go back on his word now. James smirked, Alfred looked as though he wanted to punch James, and Mr. Bates looked disappointed. _She doesn't even want to spend her half day with me now?_ he wondered.

"Does this mean you'll be helping in the kitchen this afternoon, Mrs. Bates?" Thomas joked, trying to lighten the atmosphere.

"Indeed she won't," Mrs. Patmore said, coming in with the breakfast trays for upstairs. "If Daisy and I need extra help, Alfred can do it. Anna's got her hands full with Lady Mary as it is."

Before anyone could reply, Lady Mary's bell rang and Anna quickly turned to check that everything was on the tray before lifting it –the grimace on her face as she did so was not lost on Mr. Carson.

"Is everything all right, Mr. Bates?" Mr. Carson asked as the other servants scattered to different parts of the Abbey. "This swap has been arranged since well before the house party, you know."

"It's not that –though I'll admit I'd forgotten about it," Bates admitted. "Mr. Carson, do you think Anna would be happier if I left Downton for good?"

Mr. Carson could now appreciate the predicament Mrs. Hughes' misguided promise to Anna had put her in. On the one hand, he wanted to reassure Bates that Anna both wanted and needed him, but he couldn't do that without betraying both Mrs. Hughes' and Anna's confidence. And, he realised, it wasn't his place to tell Bates, especially not in the middle of the servants' hall. Anna would have to tell Bates about the attack herself, in the safety and privacy of their cottage. And somehow, Mrs. Hughes was going to have to convince her to do that as soon as possible –both for Anna's own sake and for Bates' sanity.

"No, Mr. Bates, she would _not_," he said emphatically, realising that Bates was still waiting for an answer. "I think you will find that things between you and Mrs. Bates can be sorted with time, patience and tenderness. _Not_ by running away."

"Do you know something I don't?" Bates asked, mystified by Carson's attitude today compared to yesterday's uncertainty. Luckily for Carson, His Lordship's bell rang before Bates could press him for an answer.

_That was a lucky escape_, he thought as he watched Bates hobble off. _Now to find Elsie and ask her to speak to Anna._

"Well, what else do you think I've been telling her the past 2 weeks?" Mrs. Hughes exclaimed when he found her. "She's scared to tell him –and I hope you didn't let on to either Anna or Mr. Bates that you know or even suspect anything?"

"I had to tell him something," Carson protested. "I told him it would take time and patience but that things could be sorted." Mrs. Hughes snorted. She had spent the better part of 2 weeks keeping Anna's counsel and watching Mr. Bates be torn apart by worries and doubts, and now in 1 day Mr. Carson seemed to be intent on dropping cryptic hints for Mr. Bates to interpret.

"I'll speak to Anna again this afternoon," she said, "especially if Mr. Bates goes into the village for his half day."

"If by some miracle they seem to be on good terms this afternoon," Mr. Carson said, "send them both off for a half-day. I know Anna has swapped with Ivy, but this is no ordinary situation." He said it nonchalantly, but Mrs. Hughes knew how much it cost him to throw protocol aside.

"We'll see how things turn out today," she said. Anna couldn't go on like this much longer, of that she was certain.

xxxxx

"Those bruises seem to have gone down nicely," Lady Mary observed as Anna did her hair in front of the mirror.

"They have, Milady," Anna acknowledged, "though they looked a lot worse than they were."

"Quite an odd placement for bruises though," Lady Mary went on. "You said you fainted and hit the edge of a sink as you fell down?"

"I did," Anna confirmed. She had told this lie so often now that sometimes she could almost believe it herself. "One minute I'm standing at the sink drinking a powder, the next minute I woke up on the floor with Mrs. Hughes standing over me." _Please God don't let her suspect I'm lying. _She'd been able to sidestep questions in the servants' hall and block the ones from Mr. Bates, but if Lady Mary asked her she wouldn't be able to lie to her, though she had no idea how she'd find the words to tell her the truth. The worst of it was that Mr. Green was Lord Gillingham's valet, and Lord Gillingham had been the first person able to fully bring Lady Mary out of her shell since Mr. Matthew's death. How could she cast a shadow over Lord Gillingham for Lady Mary?

Mary shook her head as she watched Anna leave the room with the breakfast tray –balancing a lot more weight on her right side, she noticed, than her left. Anna was covering something up, she was sure of it, but how could she find out what it was? It didn't cross her mind to wonder whether she should leave well enough alone. Anna had been her rock since long before her marriage to Matthew –ever since the Pamuk incident, Mary felt that a bond had been formed between her and Anna.

Mrs. Hughes was likely to know, Mary mused, but she probably wouldn't tell her even if she did. _She did look rather flustered the evening that Anna supposedly hit her head._ And if Mrs. Hughes knew –which Mary was certain she did –maybe she had mentioned it to Carson?

xxxx

At half-past one that afternoon, Anna, Ivy and Daisy sat at the table in the servants' hall helping Ivy make her face up. Mr. Carson had walked by and in a moment of distraction suggested they take "that mess of powder" into the boot room to avoid getting cosmetics all over the table, but one look at Anna's face as all the colour drained from it had him quickly retracting his words.

"It's good to see her getting involved again," he said in a low voice to Mrs. Hughes as they watched Anna help Ivy apply her lipstick.

"She's still not herself," the housekeeper sighed. The old Anna would have been laughing, painting her own face and Daisy's as well as Ivy's.

"Let us do yours now, Anna," Daisy offered, eager to try and cheer Anna up. The younger staff had no idea what had happened to Anna, only that she was suddenly sad and that Mr. Bates was worried about her.

"No," Anna flinched, then recovered herself. "No thanks, Daisy. No one's going to be seeing me in here at any rate."

"Will you speak to her?" Mr. Carson reminded Mrs. Hughes as they heard Jimmy and Thomas clatter down the stairs.

"I will," Mrs. Hughes agreed. "Will Mr. Bates be remaining at the house this afternoon?"

"I believe not. He said he might go into Ripon to pick up a little gift for Mrs. Bates –he has no idea what's going on but he thinks it might help."

Mrs. Hughes smiled at the sweetness of Mr. Bates' gesture and mentally vowed to try and persuade Anna to open up to her husband.

"Doesn't he look good?" Thomas grinned as he led Jimmy into the hall. Mr. Carson bit back a reproach about James' hair falling about his eyes. Under cover of the exclamations over Jimmy's improved hair (courtesy of Thomas) and Ivy's new dress, nobody noticed Mr. Bates slip a folded sheet of paper into Anna's coat pocket on his way out.

"Be back before lock-up," Mr. Carson reminded Jimmy and Ivy. "And... and," he suddenly broke off, wondering how to phrase his next sentence.

"He means no funny business," Thomas filled in cheekily. Anna turned to Ivy, looking like she wanted to say something, but then Ivy stood up, smiling at Jimmy, and the moment was lost.

"Anna, do you have a minute?" Mrs. Hughes asked, then frowned as she noticed Anna's involuntary jump. _Should have made sure I had her attention first, not startled the poor girl._

"I'll put these away," Daisy said helpfully, gesturing to the makeup scattered across the table.

xxxx

"Carson, I was hoping I'd find you in here alone," Lady Mary said as she walked into the drawing room before the dressing gong to find Carson straightening things up.

"Can I help you, my Lady?" he asked, hoping she had a question about something like seating arrangements rather than about her lady's maid.

"I hope you can," she said, raising her eyebrows. "I would have asked Mrs. Hughes, but I doubt she'd tell me. It's about Anna."

From the frown that immediately appeared on Mr. Carson's face, Lady Mary guessed that he knew exactly what she was asking –and that he had the answer.

"I think you know what I mean," she said before he could deny any knowledge of it. "Ever since she came in that day with bruises all over her face, she's been so quiet and well, scared. Even the slightest noise makes her jump. She didn't really fall and hit her head, did she?"

"No, she did not," Carson admitted, hoping someone else from the family would come in so Lady Mary would have to end this uncomfortable conversation.

"Carson, I'm worried about Anna," Mary went on. "She's doing her job as well as ever, but she just seems so unhappy and scared. Bates isn't beating her, is he? If so, you must tell Papa."

He had to smile at Lady Mary's fondness and protectiveness of Anna. "Mr. Bates is anything but a wife-beater," he reassured her. "Mr. Bates is just as concerned as the rest of us are about Anna."

"Bates doesn't know either?" she wondered aloud. "But you do?"

"Anna confided in Mrs. Hughes, and from some of Mrs. Hughes' comments and my own observations I guessed at least part of the story. I know you could order me to tell you, but I hope you will choose not to. Anna wants to keep it secret, and it's not my secret to reveal –Anna does not even know that I know."

"There are some secrets that shouldn't be kept," Lady Mary said, thinking back on all the damage that had been caused by attempts to keep the Pamuk incident quiet –damage to Anna herself too, and to Bates.

"Why do you say that, milady?"

"Because I can tell that keeping this secret is hurting Anna –she's hurting so badly now that telling anyone won't make it any worse. Surely you can see that?"

"I think she's afraid that telling people what happened will hurt other people instead of her alone," Carson said, picking his words carefully.

"Carson, please stop talking to me in riddles," Mary said, starting to get irritated at his evasiveness. "I know Mrs. Hughes won't tell me, and I know you know the answer. What happened at the house party? I can guess that that's where whatever this is happened, because Mrs. Hughes sent Anna home after she supposedly hit her head on a sink, and the next morning she came in with a black and blue face... but you said Bates didn't hit her. Did some kind of fight break out downstairs?"

"Not a fight, my Lady," Carson said, knowing there was no way out of it. Lady Mary was perfectly capable of demanding to be told, and as her servant, he could not refuse to tell her. "An assault."

"By whom?" Mary gasped in shock. "You said it wasn't Bates."

"My Lady, please don't ask me to tell you that," Carson said. "I have told you what happened, but what purpose will telling you the name of the assailant serve?"

"Well, so that he can be punished," Lady Mary retorted. "Unless he has been already –has he been dismissed?"

"It was not my place to dismiss him," Carson admitted. "Even if I had been told –and I must remind you that Anna does not want the attack to become public knowledge –I have no authority to dismiss visiting servants."

"One of our visitors' valets beat Anna –and why is Anna trying to keep it secret?"

"Because of the nature of the attack, my Lady," Carson said, uncomfortable with this delicate subject. "The visiting valet did not simply beat her, he raped her. I believe Anna wants this kept secret because of shame and fear of Mr. Bates' reaction if he were to find out."

Lady Mary's eyes widened and her hands flew to her mouth. _Poor Anna_.


	4. Chapter 4

**_Thank you to all those who have left reviews… I'm not liking the way this seems to be playing out on DA, and in my mind it helps to have an alternate version available. I love Anna and Bates as a couple, always have, and watching their torment on TV is more than my imagination can handle._**

**_Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Downton Abbey. Julian Fellowes and ITV do._**

"I can't," Anna said, choking back another bout of tears. "He'll kill Green, you know he will."

"Not if Green is in police custody when you tell him," Mrs. Hughes reminded her, although the more time that passed since the attack, the less likely it was becoming that Green would be arrested even if Anna did consent to reporting the attack to the police.

"Not the police, please," Anna pleaded, becoming agitated as she always did whenever Mrs. Hughes mentioned reporting Green to the police –or when she suggested that Anna seek medical attention for her painful rib.

"How would I explain it away?" she had asked the first time Mrs. Hughes suggested calling Dr. Clarkson. "And what if he mentions something to Mr. Bates?"

Mrs. Hughes was regretting her promise to Anna more and more as she watched Anna turn paler and thinner, but Anna was no child anymore, no longer a fourteen year old housemaid who could be ordered to visit the doctor.

"People are noticing," she reminded Anna. "Mrs. Patmore has even offered to make your favourite dessert tomorrow; she's noticed you're not eating and worried it might be a problem with her cooking." She had hoped Anna might brighten up at the prospect of a strawberry and cream sponge cake: it was a rare treat, but Mrs. Patmore had had a special fondness for Anna after Anna had accompanied her to London for cataract surgery –but instead, Anna's hand went reflexively to her stomach.

"I can't eat," she said, although that much was evident by her recent weight loss. "My stomach's closed up, I feel something choking me every time I try to eat."

Mrs. Hughes' mind went immediately to a possible pregnancy, but tried to dismiss the thought from her mind. Anna would tell her if that was a possibility, wouldn't she?

Anna turned back to her sewing, which she had brought into Mrs. Hughes parlour at her request. "If I'm still in pain next time I visit Dr. Clarkson, I'll ask him about it," she conceded. "If I can think of an excuse for it. And no, I don't yet know when or if I'll need to visit Dr. Clarkson," she added, guessing that Mrs. Hughes was trying to raise a delicate question and guessing what it was. "I don't know," she added in a different tone, dashing away a tear with her hand before it could fall on and stain Lady Mary's gown.

"Don't you think Mr. Bates should know?" Mrs. Hughes pressed. "Or do you intend to keep lying to him?"

"I'm lying to spare him," Anna said through another bout of tears. "He'll hate me or he'll pity me, then he'll go after Green. And the law won't spare him again… he shouldn't have to face a noose just because of me." At this Anna laid her sewing aside and began to cry with all her heart.

"Anna," Mrs. Hughes said gently, "Mr. Bates would do anything for you –don't you think if you asked him _not_ to do something for you, he would listen?"

"And have him face living with a damaged wife?" Anna retorted. "Because that's what I will be to him if he knows."

"Never!" Mrs. Hughes said, moving over to sit next to Anna, mindful not to get any closer than the distance Anna seemed to be comfortable with lately. "Anna, when Br. Bates looks at you, he sees the woman who loved him, who waited for him, who fought to free him –and he will still see that woman when he looks at you, no matter what."

"Not anymore," Anna sobbed. "Now he won't ever look at me without remembering what happened, and he won't even want to touch me. I can't bear to have him near me now, but if he knows he won't even want to come near me."

"Give him a chance to prove you wrong," Mrs. Hughes urged. "Let him help you for once, instead of the other way round."

"How can you be so sure?" Anna's sobs showed no sign of stopping.

"Because I've seen the way he looks at you," Mrs. Hughes answered simply. "You're all he cares about in this world, and the fact that you're keeping him at arms' length is killing him."

"The truth will kill him too, either way I'm losing him."

"You'll lose him if you keep pushing him away," Mrs. Hughes warned gently, though she doubted that Mr. Bates would ever stop waiting for Anna to open up to him.

_xXx_

"Mary, are you quite well?" The Earl asked over dinner.

"What? Oh, I'm sorry Papa, I was miles away," Mary answered distractedly, taking another sip of her wine and looking around for Alfred to top it up.

"Missing Lord Gillingham already?" Edith asked slyly.

"Heavens, no!" Mary laughed. "I'm just tired I suppose."

Carson watched this little exchange with growing consternation. Lady Mary had been in a daze ever since her earlier conversation with him, and Carson was sure she was pondering what she would say to Anna next time she saw her –or, indeed, if she would say anything at all.

"Is everything alright with the dinner, My Lady?" he asked when he came to serve her the pudding wine.

"It's delicious as always, Carson," she answered lightly. "I just don't have much appetite this evening, that's all."

"You look worried about something," the Earl said. "Is little George alright?"

"He's fine," Mary answered dismissively –the nanny would have said something to her if he were not. "I suppose I'm just thinking about the next meeting with the tax people," she lied.

"Maybe you should leave the estate in my hands if it causes you this much worry," her father suggested, only to be shot down by Cora and the Dowager, who reminded him about "Matthew's wishes." How he wished they'd never come across that blasted letter!

"I'm afraid I'll have to ask you all to excuse me," Mary said, pushing back her chair before Carson had a chance to pull it out for her. "I'm not quite myself tonight."

"Shall I ask one of the maids to bring you up a tray, my Lady?" Carson suggested as Mary walked past him on her way out of the dining room.

"No thank you, Carson," Mary replied. "I need some time by myself to think for now."

_xXx_

"Lady Mary knows," Carson said urgently to Mrs. Hughes when he walked into her parlour after dinner was over. He had worried that he would find Anna with her in there, but Anna was nowhere to be found.

"She _what_?" Mrs. Hughes face' was like thunder when she turned to face him.

"She asked me, was I supposed to lie to a daughter of this house?" Mr. Carson defended himself. "She doesn't know who it was though."

"That's some consolation," Mrs. Hughes muttered: Lady Mary was perfectly capable of making a scene to Lord Gillingham if she knew the culprit was his valet. "But what if she says something to Anna? You know she might."

"Shouldn't we warn Anna?" Carson asked. "So Lady Mary doesn't catch her unaware?"

"You mean should we tell Anna that another 2 people know the secret I swore not to reveal?" Mrs. Hughes asked sarcastically. "Charles, that poor girl is going to be mortified now. She's already said she doesn't know how she'll face people if they were to find out –and for her to know that you and Lady Mary, two of the people she has most respect for –"

"And who have the utmost respect for her," Mr. Carson reminded her. "This will not change my opinion of Anna one jot –I feel more sympathy for her, I intend that Mr. Green pay for it if he ever shows his face here again, but in no way do I think Anna is damaged or at fault."

"That's the word she used: damaged," Mrs. Hughes told him. "And I haven't been able to persuade her to tell Mr. Bates yet, either." She broke off, realising that now that Lady Mary knew, it was only a matter of time before word got out.

Before Mr. Carson could say any more, someone tapped, quickly and quietly, on the parlour door.


	5. Chapter 5

**_Tried not to leave too long a gap between this and last chapter since it ended on a cliffhanger... and so far I don't plan to have any more cliff hangers as cruel as the previous one._**

**_I hope you don't think Lady Mary is out of character in this chapter: the show portrays her as cold, but Anna has been her lady's maid for so long and kept so many of Mary's confidences that I like to think the relationship between the two of them has grown into one similar to that between Robert and Bates. And either way, I'm sure that on the show, when/if Lady Mary finds out, she'd be very caring and supportive of Anna. YMMV of course, but my imagination likes it this way :p_**

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey_**

Anna stumbled into the little room as soon as Mr. Carson pulled the door open, looking over her shoulder as she did.

"Lady Mary knows," she managed to gasp out. She looked as if she had been crying non-stop for at least the past half-hour, with red eyes and breath coming in tiny gasps. "How –how did she find out?"

Mrs. Hughes stepped forward to reach out to Anna and draw her to a seat, but at that moment Anna noticed Mr. Carson standing next to the door and froze.

"Mrs. Hughes and I were just about to send for you," Mr. Carson began, wisely making no move to approach Anna.

"Anna, sit down," Mrs. Hughes said in a soothing voice. "I was hoping to speak to you before Lady Mary did, but Lady Mary retired to bed earlier than I anticipated."

"Why did you tell her?" Anna asked, unable to mask the hurt on her face.

"Anna, Mrs. Hughes did not tell anyone," Mr. Carson began. "I guessed myself, and when Lady Mary asked me earlier tonight –she already had her suspicions, I confirmed them."

A blush spread over Anna as she realised that Mr. Carson, her father-figure at Downton Abbey, knew and had told Lady Mary.

"How did you guess?" Anna asked quietly. "I thought I was hiding it."

"Not from someone who's known you for almost twenty years," Mr. Carson said. "And all I can say is I wish you had said something, or let Mrs. Hughes do so, when it happened. If you had, Green would be out of a job and under arrest by now."

"Mr. Green would be dead, and Mr. Bates back on trial," Anna answered quietly. "You know he would have killed Green."

"Not if you asked him not to," Mr. Carson replied. "Bates would do anything to see you smile again –he said so yesterday –and if his Lordship and I were to impress upon him that you need him by your side, not in a prison cell –"

"His Lordship?" Anna interrupted, starting to shake. "He doesn't know, does he?"

"No," Carson reassured her. "Not yet, at any rate."

"How did Lady Mary react?" Mrs. Hughes asked, while at the back of her mind another plan began to take root. Maybe Lady Mary could speak to His Lordship, who could then speak to Bates... if Anna agreed, of course. Watching Anna, white, exhausted and shaking in front of her, Mrs. Hughes was starting that she couldn't keep pushing Anna to speak to Bates. The ordeal was already taking enough of a toll on Anna without her and Mr. Carson forcing her to take steps she wasn't ready for.

"She was so nice," Anna said, sounding surprised. "She didn't blame me, she said I should have told her... but, but she said Mr. Bates has to know."

"Well, for once Lady Mary and I are in agreement," Mrs. Hughes said.

"Anna," Mr. Carson said gently, "there are two ways you can do this. Either we can call Bates in and you can tell him here, with myself or Mrs. Hughes present to emphasize that he is not to hunt down Green, or you can tell him in peace and quiet at home later tonight."

"Or we could have His Lordship tell him tomorrow," Mrs. Hughes suggested, but Anna shook her head.

"I don't want the story to keep spreading behind my back," Anna said. "I'll tell him, but..."

"But what?"

"What if he turns violent?" Anna asked, colour draining from her face. It was taking a lot for her to admit that she was slightly afraid of her husband's reaction. "What if he reacts badly?"

"If he does, it won't be towards you," Mrs. Hughes began, but Mr. Carson cut her off.

"Did I, or Mrs. Hughes, or Lady Mary, react badly at all?" he asked. Anna shook her head. "And Mr. Bates adores you and needs you far more than anyone else in this house –Anna, he would have been hanged if it weren't for you, and he knows it. Bates will not react in any way that should scare you. But," he continued, "I shall speak to Bates before he leaves tonight and impress upon him that he is to do nothing impulsive and that I wish to see you both back here tomorrow in one piece."

"May I go now?" Anna asked quietly. "I don't want Mr. Bates to see me like this."

When Anna had left, Mrs. Hughes and Mr. Carson went back to the servants' hall to wait for Mr. Bates to finish helping Lord Grantham, both wondering what Lady Mary had said to Anna to finally convince her to speak to Bates.

xXx

_Earlier that evening_

When Anna entered Lady Mary's room in response to her (far earlier than usual) ring, she could tell that something was different. Lady Mary wasn't sitting facing her own reflection at her dressing table; she was sitting facing the door waiting for her.

"Is everything alright, Milady?" Anna asked, immediately scanning the room for any out-of-place objects to avoid making eye contact with Lady Mary.

"Well, yes and no," Mary began. "Anna, I need to say something –I don't know how to, or whether I should even be saying anything at all, but I'm going to, and I hope it doesn't ruin the way things are between us."

Anna stopped tidying the room and turned to face Lady Mary, intrigued and a little worried at this little speech.

"I know," Lady Mary began, then stopped to take a deep breath. "I know what happened the night of the party. And all I can say is I'm sorry. I'm sorry this happened to you, and I'm sorry it took me so long to realise that something was so badly wrong."

Anna had to quickly blink back tears at this. Whatever little lecture she had been expecting from Lady Mary, it certainly wasn't this.

"You have nothing to apologise for, Milady," she began, but Mary interrupted her.

"Believe me, I do. I should have realised and said something long before this –I'm sorry to admit this, but at one point I started to wonder whether Bates was beating you up."

"Never," Anna said, and a hint of a smile appeared on her lips.

"How are you holding up?" Mary asked as Anna began to help her off with her evening gown.

"Not so well," Anna admitted. "I still dream of it, still can't stand to be touched."

"Like me after Mr. Pamuk," Mary said softly, and indeed Anna remembered that Lady Mary used to spend nights wandering around the Abbey for a few weeks after the Pamuk incident. Anna had witnessed a fair few crying fits from Lady Mary around that time too.

"I hope Mr. Bates is being supportive," Mary said tentatively, hoping that Mr. Bates hadn't reacted with rage or blame towards Anna.

"He doesn't know," Anna said, surprised that Lady Mary thought he did. "I can't tell him."

"Whyever not?"

"He'd kill the man who did it," Anna said, trying and failing to choke back tears. "And what if he thinks I'm damaged after this?" She was brushing Lady Mary's hair as she said this, but Mary held up a hand to stop her, then impulsively stood up and hugged Anna, remembering too late that Anna had said she couldn't bear to be touched –but Anna didn't push her away.

"He won't kill anyone if you ask him not to," Mary said. She hadn't had much interaction with Bates, but one thing was clear: the man worshipped the ground Anna walked on.

"I did the same thing," Mary said some ten minutes later, when Anna had stopped crying and had resumed brushing her hair. "I didn't tell Matthew about Mr. Pamuk, although in my case the whole of London knew. I pushed him away at first because I didn't want to lie to him, but I was afraid if I told him the truth –that I wasn't as pure as he thought I was –he wouldn't want to marry me. But he did, and Bates will be the same, you'll see. And you are even less at fault than I was with Mr. Pamuk."

"My Lady," Anna said as she finished braiding Mary's hair. "Thank you. For being so understanding."

"It was the least I could do," Mary said. "Now go home, and speak to Bates. I promise you'll feel like a weight's been lifted."

_xXx_

As Bates walked down the back staircase, he wondered whether Anna might have waited to walk home with him –she hadn't done so lately, but he never stopped hoping. She was nowhere to be seen when he peered into the servants' hall, but Thomas was there, sorting through a deck of cards.

"Mrs. Bates has gone home. Alone," he said when he saw Bates' hopeful look. "Trouble in paradise, Mr. Bates?"

"None of your damn business," Bates growled. Even if he and Anna were having issues, the last thing he needed was Thomas poking his nose in.

"Is that you, Mr. Bates?" Mr. Carson appeared in the hall. "I was just looking for you. Can I have a private word before you leave?"

Mr. Bates followed Carson into his office, fixing Thomas with a warning glare as he did. Mrs. Hughes was sitting in Mr. Carson's office, and Bates' stomach gave a jolt when he saw her.

"Is something wrong with Anna?" blurted as soon as the door had closed behind them. Why else would both Mrs. Hughes and Mr. Carson want to speak to him so late at night? What was so urgent that it couldn't wait until morning?

"Not quite –that is, no more than usual," Mrs. Hughes said vaguely. "But we did want to speak to you about Anna."

"Bates, have a seat," Mr. Carson said, taking his own next to Mrs. Hughes. Bates sat, looking from one to the other in puzzlement.

"You came to me earlier this week worried about Anna," Carson began and Bates nodded. "I think tonight Anna may be willing to answer your questions. _But_," he went on before Bates could interrupt with questions. "I want to emphasize that you are to do nothing rash or impulsive tonight. I hope to see you and Anna tomorrow looking a bit less defeated than you have lately."

Bates nodded agreement and turned to Mrs. Hughes. She wouldn't be there if she had nothing to add to Carson's monologue, surely?

"Mr. Bates," she began. "Anna has been terrified of speaking to you about this. So all I have to say to you is, be patient and be gentle."

_xXx_

Mr. Bates was more confused than ever as he walked back to the cottage as fast as his bad leg would let him. Unlike previous nights, though, he had two things to lift his spirits: Mr. Carson and Mrs. Hughes had all but promised him that things would become clearer tonight, and he also hoped that Anna had found the note he had slipped into her coat pocket earlier that afternoon on his way out.

On her way out of the Abbey an hour earlier, Anna had found Bates' note, which rustled as she slipped into her coat. With Thomas and Edna talking in the servants' hall, she hadn't wanted to unfold and read it in front of them so she held it in her pocket during the walk back to the cottage, where she immediately lit the oil lamp.

There, in Bates' distinctive writing, were seven short words.

_Anna, I love you. No matter what._

**_P.S. Reviews make my day_**


	6. Chapter 6

**_Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews! This story seems to be touching a chord with people, and that makes me really glad._**

**_In this chapter: Anna finally reveals all to Bates... this is what everyone's been waiting for, I'll bet :p_**

**_Disclaimer: If I owned Downton Abbey, you'd have seen this on your screens last Sunday_**

As Bates approached the cottage, he could see a dim light burning in the downstairs window –a welcome change from previous homecomings, when he had often returned home to find the cottage in darkness and Anna in bed feigning sleep. Tonight, Anna was sitting at the kitchen table, still in her full lady's maid uniform, with a note –his note, he realised –on the table in front of her. She was seated as far away from the door as possible, with the table and a chair preventing him from reaching her, but it didn't matter. It was already far more progress and contact than she had allowed for the past 2 weeks.

"Tea?" he asked as he swung the door closed.

"If you like," she said, trying to be casual, but a slight tremble in her voice and the way she began fidgeting with his note betrayed how nervous she really was.

Neither of them spoke while the water boiled, while Bates removed his hat and coat, made the tea and brought it over to Anna at the table. It took all his self control to remain silent, to wait for her to speak first, but he tried to keep Mrs. Hughes' words at the forefront of his mind. _Be patient. Be gentle._

"Thank you," Anna said as she reached out for one of the tea cups.

"Mr. Carson and Mrs. Hughes said there was something you want to tell me," he began hesitantly, unable to be patient any longer.

"Not want, exactly," Anna said, not making eye contact with him. "More like have to."

"Why?"

"Something Lady Mary said today reminded me that sometimes keeping a secret from someone, even if it's for their own good, can end up doing even more damage," she said. "And now that other people in the Abbey –Lady Mary, Mrs. Hughes and Mr. Carson –found out about it, I'm scared you'll find out some other way. And before you ask: I only told Mrs. Hughes because there was no other way around it, and Lady Mary and Mr. Carson guessed somehow. It's not because I don't trust you."

"Then why haven't you told me before?"

"Because I was –because I am ashamed of it, afraid of your reaction. And because more than anything, I want to pretend it never happened. But I can't forget." The teacup was shaking in her hand as tears welled up in her eyes.

"Anna, whatever you're going to tell me, we can get through it," he urged her. "Whatever it is. Are you sick, is that it?"

She shook her head and the tears began to fall in earnest. "Nothing that simple," she sobbed. "I don't know how to tell you this."

"Does this have anything to do with the night you fainted and hit your head?" he asked, trying to think of a way to prompt her.

"I didn't faint."

_Well, that's a start at least._

"Then where did those bruises come from?" An uncomfortably cold feeling was starting to creep over him. Anna's sobs increased and her arms wrapped themselves around her torso as if to shield or cover herself.

Ignoring his cane, he limped awkwardly over to the chair next to Anna and sat down, wanting to hold her but too afraid of a rebuttal to touch her. Tentatively, he reached his hand out to her but she pulled away from it and turned slightly away from him.

"He did it," she said, her voice so low and so mingled with gasping sobs that he had to strain to her it. "He said that –that you couldn't possibly make me happy and that he'd –he'd show me what I was missing. I tried –" but the rest of her sentence was lost as a violent burst of crying took over and she huddled in her chair, drawn as far back from him as she possibly could. The only word he could make out was "sorry," but he reached out a hand to stop her.

"You don't have anything to be sorry for," he said, his voice full of tenderness. "I can guess the rest. Just tell me who, Anna, please?"

"Mr. Green." That, at least, came out clearly.

"Anna, why didn't you tell me?"

"You'd have killed him," she said. Her sobs seemed to be dying down at least.

"Killed him? You're damn right I would have. And I'd happily swing for it too."

"Don't you see? That's why I couldn't tell you... John, I need you here with me, alive. I would rather have you alive but hating me –or thinking I hate you –than have you facing another murder trial."

"How could I have been so blind?" He said this half to Anna, half to himself. "Is this why you haven't been letting me even touch you?"

"Every time you do," Anna said, her voice still thready, "I feel his hands pulling at me instead of yours."

"Then I won't try to touch you, not until you're sure you can face it. Right now I want nothing more than to hold you and never let go of you, but I won't force any physical contact on you."

Anna tentatively reached her hand out to him and he took it, holding her fingertips lightly. Tears welled up in his eyes too, and as he noticed Anna brushing tears away from her own face with her free hand, his tears started to fall as regret, guilt and rage coursed through him.

Anna reached blindly out to him and buried her face in the hollow between his shoulder and his neck, clinging to him as more sobs wracked her body. He moved his hand slightly, but Anna immediately jerked back in fright, then one hand went to her ribcage, rubbing gently.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, immediately feeling guilty.

"It's not your fault." Her eyes were downcast again. "One of my ribs is a bit sore, that's all."

"That's _all_?" His tone left her in no doubt that he thought a sore rib was more than enough to be getting on with.

"It's only a bit bruised. It's much better than it was."

"Am I to assume you haven't received any medical attention since then? Dr. Clarkson was in the house that night too, you know."

"Mrs. Hughes wanted me to, but I wouldn't let her call him."

_I'll fight this battle another time._ Much as he wanted to insist that Anna see Dr. Clarkson about her rib –and any other injuries she wasn't admitting to –John had to be practical: it was late, Anna was exhausted and neither of them was in any fit state to argue.

"Do you want me to sleep downstairs tonight?" It took a lot for him to offer: he wanted nothing more than to stand guard as Anna slept, but now that he knew the truth, he was willing to sleep downstairs for as long as it took for Anna to feel comfortable with him again.

"No," she answered softly. "I shouldn't have pushed you away at all... and I need you close by now."

**_I'm not done yet... did you really think I'd let this fic go before Green gets what's coming to him?_**


	7. Chapter 7

**_Thanks for all the reviews :)_**

**_I don't own Downton Abbey_**

Mr. Bates was the first of the couple to wake the next morning, barely 4 hours after he and Anna had gone to sleep. Oh, well. He had a day of His Lordship's mending ahead of him, he could get through that on little to no sleep. Afraid of waking Anna, he lay still in bed, wanting to reach out and hold her, but knowing that if he did, she would awaken terrified –and that would make him no better than Green.

Mr. Green. His teeth clenched as he thought of the other valet. His immediate impulse, as Anna had correctly surmised, was to hunt the man down and beat him to a bloody pulp, choke him till his breath rattled, snap his neck in two –but he had promised Anna he wouldn't act on that instinct.

"Don't make me lose you because of him," Anna had said before they went to sleep, and he intended to keep his word to her. His exact words had been "I won't kill him" –but that didn't mean he couldn't try to think of other ways to exact revenge on the man, even if he couldn't act on many of the schemes he had thought up.

When he guessed that Anna would wake soon, he got out of bed, wincing as he put weight on his bad leg, and began to wash, dress and prepare some breakfast for himself and Anna. He much preferred it when they had time for a quick breakfast in their own cottage, although they would sit at the table with the other servants during breakfast anyway. He felt it got the day off to a better start when they could eat in peace, without people clattering in and out of the room, without Thomas' barbed comments about married life and without having to stop mid-bite if a bell rang for them –and to be honest, there was only so much of Ivy's porridge that he could tolerate per week. _God help us if Mrs. Patmore ever entrusts her with making dinner._

Anna woke while he was downstairs, dressed and slipped soundlessly down the stairs to join him. Lady Mary had been right: it did feel better to have her secret out in the open, although she cringed at the thought of facing Lady Mary and Mr. Carson that morning. She was afraid that every time they looked at her now, they'd be thinking of _that,_ and pitying her.

"Morning," John smiled as he turned to her with a platter of lightly browned bread. "How's your rib? Did you sleep well?"

"Much better than I have been lately," she admitted. "And my rib's getting slowly better –it's only a dull ache, so I'm sure it will be fine. What about you?"

"Most of my night was taken up with revenge fantasies," he said, only half joking. "It's okay, I won't act on them," he promised. With that, he sat down to his tea and toast, though Anna shook her head when he indicated the platter to her.

"I can't, my throat's closed up," she said. "Something chokes me every time I try to eat."

"All the more reason to see Dr. Clarkson," he muttered, although he didn't want to make a fuss and risk an argument. Right now, Anna was so vulnerable and so precious to him that he would go along with anything she wanted rather than risk upsetting her. If needs be, he would pick the argument up again another time, but for now he didn't want to risk breaking the fragile peace that existed between them.

The change between the Bates' escaped the notice of most of the servants at breakfast: most of them were more concerned with discussing Ivy and Jimmy's very late arrival back at the Abbey late last night –or early that morning, whichever way you wanted to look at it.

"Two in the morning!" Alfred said as Bates hung up his hat and coat. "Had to wake Mr. Carson to let them in!"

Jimmy smirked as he tucked in to a bowl of porridge, stifling yawns behind his hand. "Alfred's just jealous, aren't you Alfred?"

"At least I got a decent night's sleep," Alfred retorted weakly.

"Don't let him get to you, lad," Mr. Bates said in a low voice as he walked past Alfred into the servants' hall.

"Porridge, Anna?" a sleepy, shame-faced Ivy asked as she walked past them with a bowl of porridge for Alfred. "Mr. Bates?"

"No thanks," both of them shook their heads. "We woke up early today, so Mr. Bates had time to make breakfast," Anna said by way of an explanation.

_Well, yes, but you didn't eat any of it._

"All I can say," Mr. Carson boomed from the head of the table, "is there will be no more theatre trips for the foreseeable future." Jimmy shrugged cheekily, Ivy blushed and Alfred looked like he wanted to protest.

"That's a pity, Mr. Carson," Thomas drawled sarcastically. "I was quite looking forward to taking in a little variety show on my next half day. Now no pubs, no theatres –why, where else do you want us to get our entertainment?"

"There's plenty of entertainment at this very table," Bates whispered to Anna, who smiled at him in return. It was true: watching Thomas –the only member of staff who dared to –bait Mr. Carson was always entertaining to watch.

Mrs. Hughes caught the whisper and the smile, and was relieved to see that things appeared to be on their way back to normal for the Bates' –or at least as close to normal as they could possibly get.

"Thank you," Bates said to Mrs. Hughes when Anna had gone upstairs to see to Lady Mary. "For being there for Anna," he explained in response to her quizzical look.

"It was no trouble," Mrs. Hughes said. "How are you holding up, Mr. Bates?"

"Me?" he asked. "I'm furious with myself for not noticing, I could kill Green... but at the same time, I'm so relieved that Anna's talking to me again, though I can't deny that I'm worried about her. The pain in her ribs, the fact that she can't eat. It'd put my mind at ease if she'd agree to see Dr. Clarkson."

"Mr. Bates, over the past two weeks I've realised that it's nigh on impossible to get Anna to do something she doesn't want to do, even when it's for her own good."

"You're right there," he chuckled.

_xXx_

"You look better, Anna," Lady Mary observed as Anna finished styling her hair.

"I do feel better, milady," Anna agreed. "You were right: keeping things secret wasn't doing me or anyone else any good."

"Good to hear that," Mary smiled. "But you don't quite sound convinced."

"Well, it is rather embarrassing to face you and Mr. Carson today," Anna admitted.

"You have nothing to feel embarrassed about," Mary reassured her. "I daresay Carson feels that he was negligent in not noticing what was wrong immediately –I know I certainly do."

_xXx_

"You startled me!" Anna gasped as she left Lady Mary's room to find Bates hanging about in the corridor.

"I just wanted to check you're alright," Bates admitted, rather embarrassed at displaying this clinginess, but he hadn't been able to resist making sure Anna was okay.

"I'm fine," she reassured him. "You don't need to worry about me here. Only, while you're here, could I ask you a favour?" she continued, beginning to walk down the staircase.

"Anything."

"Could you," she began, then stopped and started again. "I –I need to get Lady Mary's riding boots. Do you think you could get them for me? They're in the boot room."

From her reluctance to go into the room, he surmised that that was the answer to a question he hadn't thought to ask. _Where?_

"I will," he promised, though bile rose in his throat at the thought of going into that room now that he knew.

When he went into the boot room, armed with a clear description of the desired footwear, leaving Anna in the servants' hall checking over Lady Mary's riding clothes, he found the door tightly shut. He tapped the door and heard two sets of muffled giggles before he heard Jimmy's –_of course, who else could it be but Jimmy? _– voice calling him to come in.

"Thought you might be Carson, looking for me," he said, relieved, when he saw that it was only Bates.

"He's in the wine cellar," Bates told him. "Thinks you're upstairs polishing silver. But Mrs. Patmore might need you soon, Ivy."

Bates knew that, technically, Jimmy and Ivy were in violation of house rules, but so many people had been willing to bend to rules for himself and Anna, that he felt he could afford to turn a blind eye to Jimmy and Ivy's harmless flirting –as long as it went no further than that.

_And let's face it, this room needs some better memories._

As he scanned the shelves for Lady Mary's boots, for a brief second he imagined he could hear Anna's screams resonate through the room, before shaking his head and telling himself to stop his imagination running away with him. Maybe it was better for the room to be known as Jimmy and Ivy's not-so-secret rendezvous spot.

_xXx_

"Pudding!" Alfred exclaimed gleefully after lunch, as Daisy brought in a large sponge cake after Ivy had cleared away the stew plates.

"My favourite," Jimmy, never one to turn down a treat, grinned. Knowing Anna's fondness for this dessert, Mrs. Hughes watched her anxiously when Mr. Carson had cut everyone a slice, hoping to see her eat something after leaving her stew untouched.

"Are you okay?" Bates whispered to her when he noticed that she'd been chewing the same bite of cake for longer than it took him to eat half his slice.

"It's like my throat doesn't want to let me swallow," Anna whispered back.

"Just a few bites?" Bates cajoled, feeling like he was talking to a stubborn child. "You love this dessert, and you never know when we'll get it again."

"I can't," Anna said, sliding her plate in front of him instead. Mrs. Hughes watched this exchange with worried eyes, trying to remember how long it had been since she'd seen Anna eat something. It seemed like it had been more than a few days, although surely she'd been eating while at the cottage, even if she wasn't eating during the servants' meals?

_xXx _

Later that afternoon, the servants' hall had quieted down considerably. Most of the staff were busy in other parts of the house, Mr. Bates was with his Lordship and Mrs. Hughes was in her parlour working on the household accounts. The only people there when Anna entered with one of Lady Mary's new dresses which needed hemming, were Jimmy, taking advantage of Mr. Carson's absence to bring his polishing into the servants' hall, and Thomas reading a penny dreadful.

_Under-butlers have it easy_, Anna thought, before she had the sensation that the hall had begun spinning around her and reached out to grab hold of the nearest chair.

"Anna, are you okay?" Thomas asked.

"I'm fine," she said, trying not to move her head for fear of the spinning sensation getting worse. "Just a bit dizzy, that's all."

"You're awfully pale," Jimmy said. "Shall we call Mrs. Hughes?"

"No need," Anna said. She stepped towards her usual seat cautiously, but before she could sit down, all the colour drained from her face and she fell to the floor, the dress fluttering limply to the ground after her.

"Call Mrs. Hughes!" Thomas barked at Jimmy, dropping his magazine and kneeling at Anna's side to check for a pulse.

When Mrs. Hughes appeared, she found Thomas propping Anna up.

"Bloody hell, she's light," Thomas commented as Anna's eyes began to open. "Weighs nothing, she does."

"What happened?" she asked weakly as Thomas helped her into a chair.

"You fainted," Thomas filled her in. "No, stay where you are," he said as he saw that Anna was going to attempt to stand.

"James," Mrs. Hughes turned to him as he returned from the kitchen with a glass of water for Anna, "please ask Daisy or Mrs. Patmore to cut a slice of the sponge cake for Anna. Or anything with sugar that they happen to have."

"She was only out for a minute or so," Thomas said to Mrs. Hughes as Jimmy scampered off. "Only she really doesn't look well."

"Did she strike her head on anything?"

"I don't think so."

"Anna, how are you feeling?" Mrs. Hughes asked her.

"Just dizzy," Anna said weakly. "Things feel like they're spinning around me."

"No nausea, no headache?"

"No," Anna confirmed as Thomas looked on, perplexed.

"Probably lack of food," Thomas said as Jimmy returned with a slice of cake, Mrs. Patmore in his wake.

"Quite likely," Mrs. Patmore chimed in.

When Mrs. Patmore had returned to her kitchen with Jimmy trailing behind her in the hope she might feel generous and give him a slice of cake for himself, Mrs. Hughes went into Mr. Carson's office for a minute, leaving Anna alone with Thomas in the servants' hall.

"Eat something," Thomas urged. Through her dizziness, Anna managed to shoot him a disbelieving look. Thomas wasn't generally concerned about anyone but himself. _But then, Thomas always sat opposite her at mealtimes, maybe her untouched plates hadn't escaped his notice._

"Come on, Anna, I can't watch you waste away. Is Bates keeping you short of food?" he joked as Anna began to force the cake down.

"I've summoned Dr. Clarkson," Mrs. Hughes announced, returning to the hall. "He'll be here shortly."

Thomas clearly saw a flash of terror pass across Anna's face as she began to protest.

"Thomas, could you please leave us for a minute?" Mrs. Hughes asked.

"Shall I call Mr. Bates?" he offered, playing for time.

"If we need Mr. Bates, I'll call him myself," Mrs. Hughes replied. "Now go, Thomas."

Thomas slowly gathered his magazine and cigarettes and went outside, not quite closing the door behind him, and sat down on the step with his back to the door and his ear pressed to the small crack he'd left. Something was wrong with Anna and he intended to find out what.


	8. Chapter 8

**_The end of this chapter may be upsetting to some readers –nowhere near as upsetting as 4.03 was, but I'd rather have you warned ahead of time._**

"I can't do this," Thomas heard Anna say, her voice fast becoming thick with tears, followed by the sound of Anna's plate being pushed away from her.

"Anna, there's no other way around this," he heard Mrs. Hughes remonstrate –although her voice was a lot more gentle than it ever had been with Thomas –or any of the other staff, come to that. "You're still in pain, you're not eating –"

"I can't," Anna protested weakly, but Mrs. Hughes wasn't done.

"For all we know, this has nothing to do with Mr. Green, you could just have picked up some other illness. Or," Mrs. Hughes hesitated. "What if you're with child?"

"That's the last thing I need," Anna groaned, pressing her head to the wood of the table.

_I thought she and old Bates wanted kids?_ Thomas wondered. He didn't like the direction this conversation was taking. Part of him wanted to walk away and forget he'd ever heard it, but something kept him rooted to the spot.

"Better to know than to assume the worst," Mrs. Hughes said, though judging from the sound of Anna's sobs, this didn't console her.

"Mrs. Hughes, I can't -," Anna paused and started again. "Every time anyone touches me, I feel Mr. Green's hands holding me down. How can I let Dr. Clarkson examine me? I'll go to pieces, I know I will."

_Green, holding her down?_ Thomas could piece the story together now, and it was making him feel more than slightly sick, and guilty as he thought of all the jibes he'd shot at Anna and Bates over the past fortnight. _I wonder if Bates knows?_

Mr. Bates and I can stay in the room if you want," Mrs. Hughes offered. "I'm sure Dr. Clarkson won't object."

With that, Mrs. Hughes led a tearful, trembling Anna into her parlour to wait for Dr. Clarkson's arrival in privacy. As soon as they were out of earshot, Thomas jumped up and retched into a clump of bushes. Whatever shameful secrets he was hiding, they were nothing compared to the one Anna had been carrying around. _And Anna, of all people?_

_xXx_

Bates emerged from Mrs. Hughes' room with a face like thunder. The servants' hall was still empty for a change, Thomas still the only occupant.

"Is Anna alright?" Thomas asked as soon as Bates appeared.

"I don't know," Bates said wearily as he dropped into a chair next to Thomas. "Anna's in tears in that room and Dr. Clarkson's banished me from the room while he examines her –he seems to think my presence is upsetting Anna more." Personally, he thought it might make it easier for Anna if he was in the room to hold her, but he and Mrs. Hughes had thought it best not to argue with Dr. Clarkson if they didn't want him to guess the truth behind Anna's obvious upset and fear.

"Bates," Thomas began. "I don't know how to say this but I'm sorry. Sorry this happened to Anna. She never deserved anything like this." _Really articulate there, Thomas._

"How do you know?" Bates demanded, although with much less force in his voice than he normally would use when talking to Thomas.

"I heard Anna and Mrs. Hughes talking before Dr. Clarkson arrived," Thomas admitted. "I won't tell anyone, you have my word. I can help you drag his name through the mud if you need to."

"Who?"

"Green." From the way Thomas' mouth curled in disgust, Bates could tell Thomas was telling the truth. "I know footmen in other houses, I could write to them and tell them Green's not to be trusted, and word would soon get around."

"Thank you Thomas, but I have something more direct in mind," Bates said.

"I can help," Thomas offered again. "Not because I want to help you," he amended quickly. "But for Anna, I'll do it."

Mrs. Hughes' head popped round her door.

"Mr. Bates, could you come back in here, please?"

Much as they'd wanted to avoid it, Dr. Clarkson had guessed at least part of the story when Anna had what could only be described as a flashback as soon as he began his examination, and with Mr. Bates gone, she had become increasingly more distraught.

With Bates there for her to hold onto his hand, she managed to get through the examination, despite shaking like a leaf throughout.

"Anna, when was your last cycle?" Dr. Clarkson asked as he pressed gently down on Anna's abdomen.

"About seven weeks ago," Anna admitted, unable to make eye contact with Bates.

"Any nausea or excessive tiredness?"

"No," Anna confirmed.

"Well," Dr. Clarkson said, stepping back and indicating to Anna that she could get dressed again. "It doesn't seem to me that you're pregnant."

Bates let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding and Anna immediately looked a little less troubled, although puzzled.

"If your cycle still hasn't returned in, say, 2 months, I'll need to re-examine you, but for now, since there are no other indications of pregnancy, I'm inclined to attribute it to your quick, sudden weight loss. You do need to put the weight you've lost back on."

When Dr. Clarkson left, leaving a salve for Anna to rub onto her rib, Bates squeezed Anna's hand gently.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"Relieved," Anna admitted. "You have no idea how relieved I am."

_xXx_

As Bates and Anna walked back to their cottage that night, Anna held on to Bates' hand –after clinging to it like a lifeline during Dr. Clarkson's examination that afternoon, she was surprised to find that the feeling of Bates' hand on hers didn't make her skin crawl –and Bates, for his part, was far more grateful for this small act than he had ever considered possible.

"Shall I make you something to eat?" he offered after he'd hung his coat up.

"If you'll eat with me, yes please," Anna nodded. She didn't really feel like eating but she knew that if she couldn't make herself eat, she'd hear about it from both Bates and Mrs. Hughes –and end up back at Dr. Clarkson's.

"I think we've got some biscuits somewhere," Bates murmured as he looked for something to tempt Anna's appetite with. The next day, he thought, he'd ask Daisy if the kitchen could spare anything from their larder: if it was for Anna, Mrs. Patmore wouldn't mind.

"What's on your mind?" he asked as he watched Anna nibble a biscuit, seemingly lost in a daydream.

"I was just thinking," Anna said. "Every time someone touches me, I feel _his_ hands on me... but I don't want that. Will you help me forget that feeling?"

Taking a deep breath to steel herself, she left her chair and approached John tentatively.

_It's only John_, she repeated to herself as his arms went round her. She'd never imagined that she would have to force herself to kiss John, but she pushed herself to do it, telling herself that she only had to force herself just this one time, for her body to forget Green and instead remember John's touch.

"Are you sure about this, Anna?" John asked her.

"Yes," she lied.

She was alright until she felt John's hands at her dress, then all of a sudden she was back in the boot room. _You know you want this. Tell me you want this_.

"No!" she shrieked. "Stop!" Her hands pushed desperately at John, who immediately pulled away from her as her arms went up to shield herself and she made herself as small as possible as she crumpled on the floor.

"Anna!" John gasped, kneeling down beside her, ignoring his knee's protest as it hit the ground. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry, Anna, are you okay?"

"I think so," Anna said as her eyes began to focus again and she realised where she was. "I'm the one who should be sorry, John. I wanted to badly to replace the memories of him with memories of you."

"And you shall, in your own time," John reassured her. He ached to hold her in his arms and comfort her, but after what had just happened, he didn't quite dare. "You control this part of our relationship now, I won't ask you to do anything more than you feel comfortable with. And if you decide something then change your mind, that's okay too."

In bed, John felt Anna's hand reaching tentatively out to him. Careful not to even brush her arm, he raised her hand up to his face and held it against him, thankful that they had at least made a tiny step towards normalcy that day. _Tiny steps, no matter how long it takes Anna to make them_, he thought as he drifted off to sleep, holding Anna's hand tight to him.


	9. Chapter 9

**_Looks like the question "is Anna pregnant or not?" has stirred up a lot of emotions, but in this version, Dr. Clarkson's diagnosis is correct: Anna is not pregnant... that would be beyond cruel. What Julian Fellowes has in store for us, though, I have no idea._**

**_Thanks for all your reviews, I love hearing your take on these scenes and characters :)_**

"You all right, Anna?" Thomas asked when Anna and Mr. Bates entered the servants' hall next morning. "Gave us quite the scare yesterday."

"Much better, thanks," Anna smiled gratefully at Thomas. As she sat down opposite him, a thought struck her. _If I can't bear to be touched by men, why is it that I didn't panic when Thomas helped me after I fainted yesterday?_ Pushing it temporarily out of her mind, she resolved to wonder further about it later and turned her attention back to Thomas. "And thanks for your help yesterday. Mr. Bates and I were just saying how lucky it was that you were there."

"It might have been worse if the hall had been empty," Bates agreed, coming back from the kitchen where he'd been having a quick chat with Daisy and Mrs. Patmore and sitting down next to his wife.

"You seem to be making quite a habit of fainting lately," Edna, sitting further up the table, said slyly. "Not at all like you, Anna."

"Anyone can be taken ill, Edna," Mrs. Hughes said, squashing Edna before she could stir up suspicion or curiosity.

"Happens to the best of us," Thomas agreed as Daisy and Ivy began bringing in bowls of porridge.

Anna dipped her spoon cautiously into her bowl, willing herself to eat it. _There's nothing in your throat, you can eat this._

"Sugar, Anna?" Thomas suggested, holding the sugar bowl out to her. "You look like you could use it." Anna accepted the suggestion, and as she sprinkled sugar into her bowl, was surprised to see what looked like an encouraging smile on Thomas' face. _What is happening with Thomas today?_

The bells for the valets and ladies' maids rang later than usual that day, so the servants could linger longer than usual over their breakfast, despite Mr. Carson's anxious looks at the clock.

"I should go and wake his Lordship," Bates said once the housemaids had been sent to begin cleaning the library.

"Anna, could I have a word with you, please?" Mrs. Hughes asked.

"Of course," Anna pushed her chair back. "Call me if Lady Mary rings for me?" she asked Jimmy and Alfred, who were sniggering together at one end of the table over some private joke. "I think she'll be sleeping in this morning, but just in case."

"We'll call you," Jimmy promised as Anna followed Mrs. Hughes into her parlour.

"How are you today?" Mrs. Hughes asked. After Anna and Bates had left the night before, she and Mr. Carson had wondered whether it might be a good idea to give Anna a couple of days off to rest and regain her strength, especially after her fainting spell earlier, but in the end they had decided to present it as an option to Anna but let her decide whether or not to take it.

"Better, thanks," Anna answered. "I think Dr. Clarkson was right about it being lack of food that was the problem yesterday –I feel less light-headed now that I've managed to eat something."

"If you think it would help, you could take a couple of days to rest and get back to full strength," Mrs. Hughes offered. "Edna and I could see to Lady Mary in the meantime."

"Thank you," Anna said, "but I think I'd rather be here, working and surrounded by people. At home, alone, all I'd be able to do is think about what happened. It's easier to forget about it here, there's always something happening to take my mind off it."

"Well, the offer's there if you and Mr. Bates think it's necessary," Mrs. Hughes said. She would also tell Mr. Bates about it in private –he was better placed than she was to assess Anna's strength and how she was coping.

"Mrs. Hughes, could I ask you something?" Anna asked, beginning to fidget with her wedding ring.

"Of course, dear," Mrs. Hughes assured her.

"It's about Thomas," Anna began hesitatingly. "Something happened yesterday that I can't quite understand. I've told you that I can't bear to be touched by men –I panic even if Mr. Bates tries to put his arms around me."

"Go on," Mrs. Hughes nodded.

"Well, when I fainted yesterday, you remember it was Thomas who helped me up? I just realised today that I didn't panic at all when he did, and I'm not sure why? And it seems disloyal to Mr. Bates to panic when he comes near me but to be okay with Thomas." Anna's voice trailed off. What _was_ it about Thomas that made her feel instinctively that he was no threat to her?

Mrs. Hughes smiled, as though she knew the answer but was waiting for Anna to figure it out for herself. A few seconds later, she realised.

"Thomas would never look at a woman in that way," she murmured, relieved as she finally understood why she felt no fear around Thomas.

"Thomas is no more a threat to you than Daisy or I would be," Mrs. Hughes reminded her. A small smile of relief crossed Anna's face. It still didn't sit well with her that she panicked at her husband's touch but not at Thomas', but at least it made sense to her. _It still doesn't explain why Thomas is being so nice to me though._

"Anna!" Jimmy called her from behind the door. "Lady Mary's ringing for you!"

_xXx_

A few more days passed and Thomas was still being unnaturally nice and solicitous to Anna. _"If it were anyone else, Mr. Bates would be getting jealous,"_ Edna joked, although no one paid much heed to her.

Bates, in fact, was anything but jealous. Like Mrs. Hughes, he had worked out that Thomas was anything but a threat to Anna's safety, and after his short conversation with Thomas the day Anna fainted, he knew that Thomas, for reasons only he knew, had a genuine affection for Anna. And he felt better knowing that there was someone else in the servants' hall who had Anna's back. Much as it pained him when Anna shrank back from him, when he saw Anna talking easily to Thomas it gave him hope that some day, maybe soon, Anna would be back to the way she was before the attack. _And I'll owe Thomas for helping her along the way._

There were still bumps along the way for Anna and Bates... little things that they had previously taken for granted had been ripped away from them. A decent night's sleep, for one.

"Maybe Dr. Clarkson can give you something to help you sleep through the night," Mrs. Hughes had urged when Anna admitted to her that she was having nightmares more often than not –and that the nightmares frequently ended with her crying out and waking Mr. Bates.

Anna had suggested to Bates that perhaps one of them should sleep downstairs. "That way, at least you'd be able to sleep through the night."

"Never," Bates insisted. Heart wrenching though it was to wake up to Anna sobbing in fear, convinced that she could feel or smell Green, he would rather be next to her for her to hold on to while he reassured her that she was safe, than sleep through the night away from her.

Bates had stuck to his earlier promise to Anna and was letting her control the pace for the physical side of their relationship, but he was starting to get worried. Anna was trying to push herself faster than she was ready for, he could tell, and all her attempts to initiate any intimacy ended, at best, with Anna shaking in fear, and at worst, with a flashback to the attack. And inevitably, Anna would have repeated nightmares throughout the night.

Lady Mary agreed with Mrs. Hughes –she had noticed the dark shadows under Anna's eyes and finally managed to get part of the story out of her maid.

"You were the one who suggested that I see Dr. Clarkson when I couldn't sleep," she reminded her, referring to the weeks immediately following Matthew's death. "Won't you do the same for yourself?"

"I'll go this afternoon," Anna agreed after one particularly bad night as she and Bates walked up to the Abbey.

"It might make you feel more like yourself," Bates said. Already she seemed more like her old self: she was able to talk with the rest of the staff, she was less jumpy and sometimes she even managed a laugh. Very slowly, even her ability to tolerate physical contact was improving... but how he hated that word. It sickened him to think that his wife merely tolerated physical contact, rather than welcomed or enjoyed it.

"I'm sorry this is causing so much trouble," Anna murmured, half to him and half to herself, as though she had read his thoughts.

"Anna!" Bates turned to her and gently took hold of her wrist. "None of this is your fault, you need to remember that. I love you, and we waited _years_ for each other. I'll wait however long it takes this time too."

The small bottle of pills rattled in her pocket as they walked back to the cottage that evening.

"What did he say?" Bates asked. This was their first opportunity to talk in private since Anna had slipped off to the hospital earlier that afternoon while in the village running an errand for Lady Mary.

"Just what I expected him to say," Anna sighed. "That this will pass, that these sedatives aren't meant to be permanent. Lady Mary took these for the first 3 months after Mr. Matthew's death, she reminded me today. And they seemed to work for her."

"Then let's hope they work for you too," Bates said. "Why don't you go straight up to sleep when we get home?"

Exhausted after a series of broken nights interspersed with long days of work, Anna was in no shape to argue. "I will," she agreed.

Barely fifteen minutes later, Bates emerged from their little bathroom in his night clothes to find Anna already so deeply asleep that she didn't stir when he got into bed next to her and drew the covers up over them.

_Must have been some really strong pills_, he thought as he closed his eyes.

_xXx_

"Anna's looking much better lately," Mrs. Hughes observed one evening a few weeks later as she and Carson sat in her parlour going over the household accounts. It was close to three months since the attack, and gradually Anna was moving closer to the person she had been before Green's arrival at the Abbey.

"Indeed she is," Carson agreed. That afternoon, Thomas had convinced Anna to join him in a prank he and Jimmy were playing on Alfred, and Anna had laughed just as hard as they had at the sight of Alfred scurrying about the house looking for a "left-handed tea-set" which Jimmy and Thomas had convinced Alfred that Mr. Carson needed before the Dowager's next visit.

"There is no such thing in this house as a pink left-handed tea-set, Alfred," a puzzled Mr. Carson had boomed when he ran into Alfred hunting frantically through cupboards. One look at Jimmy and Thomas stifling their laughs was enough for him to understand that a prank was being played, but he didn't have the heart to reprimand them when he saw that Anna was also having trouble concealing a laugh at the sight of Alfred looking for the tea-set in the nursery after she had told him, with a perfectly straight face, that she thought Miss Sybbie might have borrowed it to play tea-parties. It had been too long since anything had been able to make Anna laugh, though in Carson's opinion it was rather odd how caring Thomas was being towards Anna, and he said as much to Mrs. Hughes.

"Do you think he might know something?" he mused aloud.

"Who knows," Mrs. Hughes shrugged. "Apart from you and me, Thomas is the only member of staff who has been here as long as Anna, so I'm sure he noticed the change in her. Maybe he's just being friendly for once. And I'm sure Mr. Bates doesn't mind what makes her laugh, what's important is that something does. Goodness knows the poor girl needs to laugh."

But if Anna was laughing again, Fate had something in mind which would stop her laugh in its tracks once more.

**_Next chapter: Our villain returns_**


	10. Chapter 10

_**I don't own anything related to Downton Abbey**_

"Lord Gillingham has written to invite himself for a weekend next month," Lady Mary said one evening as Anna brushed her hair. "I can't think why –with no other guests staying and no parties going on, I'm afraid he'll find it all dreadfully dull."

"I'm sure he's only coming to see you, my Lady," Anna said, but the hand holding the brush had begun to shake. If Lord Gillingham were coming to stay, he'd bring his staff, surely? That meant she'd have to see _him_ again. It had never crossed her mind that Mr. Green's attack had been anything but an isolated event, but at the thought of him staying in the house again, terror began to creep through her. What if he managed to corner her again, what if he found her alone in one of the laundry rooms or an attic? And with Green in close proximity, would John be able to keep his promise to her?

"Anna?" The pause in her brushing and the sudden pallor of her face had not gone unnoticed by Lady Mary. "Is everything all right?"

"Yes, of course, my Lady," Anna answered weakly. "Will that be all?"

"I suppose so," Mary said, still wondering what it was about her mention of Lord Gillingham that suddenly had Anna so flustered. The last time Anthony had stayed over it had been for the house –

Mary gasped as realisation dawned on her.

"Anna," she began quietly before Anna had reached the door of the room. Anna turned, looking resigned to a bout of questioning.

"Did Lord Gillingham have anything to do with the –with the attack the night of the house party?"

"It wasn't Lord Gillingham, my Lady, if that's what you're asking."

"His valet?" Mary asked, although she was certain that was it. Hadn't Carson told her it was a visiting servant?

A slight flush appeared in Anna's cheeks as she nodded, unable to meet Mary's eyes.

"Yes, my Lady, it was." Anna bit her lip to keep from crying at the thought of Green back in the house.

"You must let me tell Papa," Lady Mary urged. "He can write to Lord Gillingham and strongly discourage him from bringing his valet –Thomas can dress him instead, surely?" But Anna refused to allow Lord Grantham to be told.

"I don't want any fuss made," she said. If truth be told, she was also afraid that other members of the household would take their guest's side if word got out, and believe that she had led him on.

_xXx_

As soon as she left Lady Mary's room, Anna shot straight down the back stairs where, as luck would have it, the first person she came across was Thomas on his way out of the boot room.

"Have you seen Mr. Bates?" she asked him, fear evident in her tone.

"With his Lordship," Thomas answered. "Is something wrong?"

"Or Mrs. Hughes?" Anna continued, not heeding Thomas' question.

"She's with Mrs. Patmore. Anna, what's wrong?" Anna had slumped with her back against the wall and her hands went up to her face in a vain attempt to hide her tears from Thomas.

"He's coming back," she began, and as soon as she admitted it out loud, she began to shake, unable to stem the flow of tears. "What do I do?"

Thomas cautiously reached out to take Anna's wrist, hoping she wouldn't pull away but trusting that the better relationship they were slowly building would make it easier for Anna to let him help her. Trustingly, Anna let him lead her to a seat at the table, where the two hall boys sitting there took one look at the scowl Thomas gave them and hot-footed it out of there.

When Bates and Mrs. Hughes entered the servants' hall a few minutes later, they found Anna crying into her hands with Thomas sitting next to her with a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Anna! Whatever's the matter?"

"Green's coming back," Thomas spat out. "Lady Mary just told her."

"We won't let him hurt you again," Bates said, sitting down on Anna's other side, but Anna's panic was too far gone for her to listen to his platitudes. Mrs. Hughes' mind was racing: how long would Lord Gillingham and his valet be staying, and could she come up with some pretext for giving Anna some time off while Green was at the house?

When Mr. Carson walked through the hall, he was met with a sight he never thought he'd see: Thomas and Mr. Bates were sitting one on either side of Anna trying to comfort her.

"Who knew our Mr. Barrow had a heart?" he asked Mrs. Hughes.

"Well, about the only person who could make him show that he has a heart is Anna," Mrs. Hughes answered.

"We won't leave you alone for a minute," Bates promised, not thinking through the logistics of it. He knew better than to mention any revenge schemes to Anna, although inwardly he was wondering what he could do while Green was on his own turf to make him pay.

"And we'll keep an eye on him too," Thomas added. _And if Bates doesn't give him a good roughing-up, I will._

_xXx_

The change in Anna was sudden and heart-breaking to watch. In the space of a week, she became withdrawn, stopped laughing again and her nightmares increased despite nightly doses of sedatives.

"Three separate nightmares in six hours!" Bates complained to Thomas the morning before Lord Gillingham and his valet were due to arrive. "That animal is going to pay for what he did to her, just wait and see."

"Thought you promised Anna you wouldn't get yourself thrown back in prison?" Thomas looked round cautiously to be sure no one could overhear them before speaking. Bates was a man of his word, but he had a feeling this was one promise Bates couldn't bear to keep.

"I also need to make sure that animal never hurts another woman again," Bates answered non-commitally.

_xXx_

The morning of Lord Gillingham's visit dawned at last –thankfully he would only be staying for three days, although that, according to Mrs. Hughes, was plenty. She had devised a number of errands to keep Anna out of the house for one afternoon and moved Anna's half-day to the last day of Lord Gillingham's visit, but Lord Grantham had devised an elaborate dinner party for the second night of the visit which meant that on that day at least, all members of staff had to be at the house preparing for it.

Anna had woken that morning complaining of a headache, and she was as white as a sheet as the staff gathered outside the house to await Lord Gillingham's arrival. Bates kept hoping she wouldn't faint as they lined up –he would give anything to be standing next to her as they waited, but he had Thomas on one side of him and Edna on the other, with Anna standing on Edna's other side.

"She'll be fine," Thomas whispered to him just before the car drew up. "Green won't dare say or do anything with everyone around."

Even with Thomas' whispering reminders to him to stay calm and not make a scene in public, Bates trembled with rage as he watched Green scan the row of servants, his eyes lingering on Anna.

Lord Gillingham had arrived just before lunch, which meant that once the upstairs luncheon had been served and cleared away, the servants only had to get through their own lunch before Anna could leave to run Mrs. Hughes' errands in Ripon –which would also give Bates and Thomas some time to confer between them. Although neither of them had said it out loud, there seemed to be an unspoken agreement between them that they were looking out for opportunities to pay Green back. Much as Bates had considered Thomas to be a snake in the grass in the past, Bates had to admit that this time Thomas seemed genuine.

Without any prompting, the seating arrangements changed slightly at lunch to give Mr. Green the same seat he had occupied during his past visit –which happened to be the seat on Anna's right. Even with Bates on her left and Thomas opposite her, Anna sat frozen during the meal, barely daring to move her right arm for fear of accidentally brushing against Green.

"We'll swap at the next meal," Bates promised as he felt Anna trying to shift unobtrusively to the left to leave as much space as possible between herself and Green and cursing himself for not thinking of this before. Carson's rank order be damned, Anna would not sit next to that monster at another meal.

"She can swap with me too if you think Carson would take that easier," Thomas offered once Anna had left and Green had gone upstairs to see to his master.

"Thank you, Thomas, but I need to do this myself," Bates answered. Green needed to know that he knew, dammit, and somehow he had to pay. _Poison in his tea would be too obvious, wouldn't it?_

Anna didn't turn up for dinner at the house –neither of them had really expected that she would, and Bates had assumed that she would rather eat at the cottage than in the servants' hall that day. With near-perfect timing, she appeared minutes before Lady Mary rang for her, with just enough time to pass her purchases over to Mrs. Hughes.

"One day down," Thomas murmured encouragingly to her when she returned downstairs, having spent half an hour helping Lady Mary prepare for bed and convincing Lady Mary that she was indeed alright.

"All the upstairs folk would do is dismiss him with a bad reference," Thomas said as he sat with Anna waiting for Bates to finish with Lord Grantham. Anna had wondered aloud whether she should have agreed with Lady Mary's suggestion to speak to Lord Grantham about Green, but Thomas agreed with Bates that involving Lord Grantham would be pointless.

"That's right," Bates agreed when he appeared downstairs in the middle of their conversation. "He'll get his comeuppance another way, Anna."

The Bateses left the house soon afterwards and Thomas settled down in a chair to wait for Green –whether to chat to him or to watch for any little habits which he and Bates could use to gain an advantage over him, he wasn't yet sure.

Green didn't linger long in the hall when he returned, almost seeming uncomfortable in Thomas' presence. Although Thomas went up to his room soon afterwards –two doors along from the one assigned to Green –he was too restless to sleep, and an hour later was still sitting up in bed with a book when he heard a door swing open and footsteps going down the back staircase. It had to be Green, Thomas thought, as he heard the stairs creak –all the Abbey staff knew which steps creaked and how to avoid them.

Thomas waited a minute or two before following Green down the stairs, all the while wondering whether to shadow Green or reveal himself. Had Bates been there, he would most likely have revealed himself and beat the living pulp out of Green –but Bates wasn't there, and Thomas knew Bates would never forgive him if he robbed him of the chance to pay Green back himself. While Thomas was having this internal debate with himself, he heard another door swing open and hurried down: only to find the back door ajar and Green pacing aimlessly around outside.

Resisting the urge to lock Green out: it wouldn't do any good, and Thomas and Bates might be able to use this to their advantage another time, Thomas slipped back up to his room, although he didn't sleep until he heard the back door close and Green return to his room around half an hour later.

_Well, well, our man likes midnight walks, does he?_ Thomas thought. _How can Mr. Bates and I use this knowledge to help us?_


	11. Chapter 11

**_Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey. If I did, Green would have been made into sausages and fed to Isis long ago_**

"Didn't you sleep well last night, Mr. Gillingham?" Thomas asked the visiting valet over breakfast.

"Quite well," the man answered, "once I managed to drop off to sleep."

"First night in a new bed is always strange," Daisy said as she came in with a basket of fresh bread. "I remember my first few nights here, the bed just felt wrong somehow."

Much as Mrs. Hughes wanted to discourage Daisy –or any of the other servants –from striking up even harmless conversation with Green, she had no idea how to do it without frightening them or giving away Anna's secret.

"I only ask," Thomas went on, "because last night, must have been around 2am, I came downstairs for a drink and found the back door swinging open. Thought it might have been you, since no one else at Downton has a habit of taking nightly walks."

"It was me, actually," Green admitted easily. "Couldn't sleep at first, thought a walk might calm me down enough to sleep."

"I think we've got some sleeping pills lying around," Thomas said. "Don't we, Mr. Carson? Or if not, I've got some in my room, Dr. Clarkson gave them to me a couple of weeks ago. Work like a charm, they do. I can give you some if you'd like."

"Thank you Thomas, I'm sure that's very kind of you," Mrs. Hughes said. _What on earth was Thomas playing at?_

"Thank you," Green said, not noticing anything off about Thomas' offer. "Might need to trouble you for them –mine seem to have stopped working for some reason."

"Maybe you need a higher dose," Thomas suggested pleasantly.

Just then, the back door swung open and Bates and Anna came in.

"So sorry we're late," Bates apologised, walking in a few steps ahead of Anna. "Have we been rung for?" He slipped easily into Anna's usual seat, leaving her to sit in his, banking on the fact that Mr. Carson wouldn't point out this lapse in etiquette in public and order them to switch seats. Later, he'd speak to him and explain, but the important thing was, for now Anna didn't have to sit next to Green.

Both of them accepted a bowl of porridge from Ivy, but before Anna could finish hers, Lady Mary's bell rang.

"She's up early," Mrs. Hughes observed as Anna collected the breakfast tray and dashed from the room.

When he turned back to his bowl, hoping his Lordship wouldn't ring before he'd finished his breakfast, Bates noticed that Thomas was trying to signal something to him.

_xXx_

"I'm sorry about the seating arrangements, Mr. Carson," Bates said when it was just him and the butler in the servants' hall after breakfast –_Lord Grantham must be having a lie-in._

"Most unorthodox, Bates," Carson agreed. "

"It's because that Anna was so uncomfortable sitting next to Mr. Gillingham," Bates explained. "Do you think it would be okay if we changed seats until Mr. Gillingham's gone?"

Mr. Carson's expression softened at the mention of Anna. "Of course, Bates, of course. I'm only sorry we didn't think of it sooner."

_xXx_

"What on earth was all that mouthing and eyebrow raising at breakfast all about?" Bates asked when he came across Thomas in the corridor a couple of hours later.

"I need to speak to you," Thomas said in a low voice. "Can you get away from the house for a bit? Don't want anyone overhearing us. It's about Green, and _don't tell Anna_."

"I'm going into the village later this afternoon to pick up some things for his Lordship," Bates said. "Think you can find an excuse to walk down with me?"

"I'm running errands for Mr. Carson," Thomas answered. "No one will suspect if we leave the house together after lunch."

Bates put Thomas' request out of his mind and went on with his daily business, hoping he might catch a glimpse of Anna somewhere. Although she had reassured him that she'd be fine, he couldn't help worrying that Green would somehow catch her alone, would corner her somewhere.

"Where were you?" he asked when he finally ran into her on the staircase on their way down for lunch.

"Lady Mary  
suggested I work on her dress for tonight in her room," Anna said. Lady Mary's exact words were "I'd rather you be in here rather than in the servants' hall with that man prowling about," and Anna had to admit she was grateful for Lady Mary's thoughtfulness.

_xXx_

"Does anyone need anything from the village?" Thomas asked once lunch was over downstairs. After he'd taken Jimmy's request for pomade and Daisy's for stamps, he pushed his chair back. "Right, I'll see you all later."

"Mind if I walk with you?" Bates asked, hoping Mr. Green wouldn't also decide he could do with a walk. "I need to pick up some things for his Lordship and I should probably go now, he won't need me again for at least two hours."

"I know how we can get at Green," Thomas said as soon as they were out of earshot.

Immediately, Bates was all ears. "Go on."

"He takes sleeping pills. And midnight walks."

"And people can accidentally take too many sleeping pills?"

"And people can be very drowsy on their walk in the dark in an unfamiliar place and trip and fall into that duck pond," Thomas corrected, jerking his head towards the duck pond they were walking past.

"No one can know," Bates said.

"Especially not Anna," Thomas agreed.

They spent the rest of their walk to the village discussing their plans, switching to small talk whenever anyone walked past them. On the way back to the Abbey, Bates stopped at the cottage and helped himself to a handful of the sedatives Dr. Clarkson had given Anna –Anna wouldn't notice four or five missing –and slipped them into the pocket of Thomas' livery on his return to the house.

_xXx_

Dinner that evening went on and on. Bates grew restless watching Green as they sat in the servants' hall watching the footmen and Thomas walk in and out with dishes. Suppose Green fell asleep immediately tonight?

"He won't," Thomas shrugged easily when Bates cornered him on the stairs to ask this question.

"Anna, why don't you and Mr. Bates sleep here tonight?" Mrs. Hughes asked when half past twelve rolled around and most of the servants were still waiting around. "There's an empty room in the maids' quarters, and I'm sure Mr. Bates could share Thomas' room for one night."

Bates had to suppress a grin –what a stroke of luck!

"Well, as long as Thomas can refrain from throwing himself at me," he joked.

"Anna," he said as soon as Mrs. Hughes had scurried off. "It's okay. Green can't get into the maids' quarters, you know that." _And Green wouldn't be around much, not if he and Thomas had their way._

"It'll be strange, not sleeping next to you," Anna said, trying to hide her fear. She had every intention of barricading her door and not leaving the room.

"It's only for one night," he reassured her as the first bells rang and all the gathered servants heaved sighs of relief.

"Thomas, might I trouble you for the sleeping pills?" Green asked. "I'm still wide awake, think I'll end up staring at the ceiling all night if I don't."

"I'll get them for you," Thomas said. When he returned, he was holding 3 of the pills Bates had given him instead: they were stronger than his own. He looked round to make sure Mr. Carson and Alfred had seen him hand them over. "May not be a good idea to take your usual ones on top of these." He followed Green out of the room and laid a hand on his arm.

"I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep either," Thomas said confidentially. "Usually come down here for a glass of cocoa if I can't drop off immediately, know what I mean?" He let his gaze trail suggestively over Green, trying desperately not to retch as he did so. But if his instincts about Green were right... And Green did seem to perk up at that.

"Well, then I might see you later," Green said rather cheerily.

_xXx_

"He'll be there," Thomas promised as Bates paced restlessly up and down the small room they had to share. "And stop pacing, he'll hear you."

"Hear that?" Thomas asked a few minutes later. "That's him! I'll go down after him. Remember, once you hear us leave the house, give us a few minutes before leaving."

Soon enough, Bates heard the back door swing open and Green and Thomas' voices began to recede.

_You're doing this for Anna_, he reminded himself. When his nerves failed him, all he had to do was remember Anna as she had been in those first weeks after Green's attack: jumpy, terrified of being approached or touched. Just remembering her tears on the night she told him everything gave Bates more than enough strength to kill.

Bates had no idea what Thomas had said to Green to lure him out –_or how he had bribed him_ –but the two were out fairly close to the duck pond now. Green's gait was clearly rather lopsided: not surprising if he had taken all 3 of the sedatives, Bates remembered that half a pill had been sufficient to put Anna into a deep sleep for a couple of hours. Leaving his cane behind –its tapping sound might give him away –Bates hurried after them as quickly and quietly as he could.

"Did you hear that?" Green asked, grabbing hold of Thomas' wrist.

"Heard what?" Thomas asked innocently. "Must have been something from one of the farms you heard, sound carries on such a still night. Care for a cigarette?"

"I suppose you're right," Green said. He took the proffered cigarette from Thomas, and fumbled to light it.

_This is the man who hurt Anna_, Bates told himself as he watched Thomas push Green and overbalance him and hurried towards the struggle.

Thomas was pinning Green down by the shoulders when Bates appeared and dropped onto Green like a stone, one knee pressing into his stomach. When Thomas was certain Green was weakening, his breath coming in short, fast pants, and wouldn't be able to get up, he let go of Green's shoulders and pressed his hands over Green's nose and mouth instead. Before long, Green's struggles ceased and he lay back limp under Bates' bulk.

"Unconscious," Bates announced triumphantly. _Like I told Anna, prison was an education in more ways than one_. He and Thomas carried the body none-too-gently towards the duck pond and positioned it carefully, face submerged in the filthy water, to look as if Green had been walking and tripped: Bates even added some twigs beneath one of his feet to look as if Green had tripped over them.

"No footprints," Thomas said in relief as they hurried away, both hoping that no one had come downstairs in the meantime. Luck was on their side as the kitchen was still deserted. Leaving the back door unlatched and swinging open, they climbed the stairs to Thomas' room and dropped, exhausted, into their beds.

"Thomas?" Bates called to the under-butler. "Why?"

Thomas didn't pretend not to have understood. "I owe my job to you and Anna," he answered simply. "And Anna's one of the few people here who was always kind to me, like she is to everyone –always was, ever since we first arrived at Downton. And because no one should get away with what he did. That's 3 reasons, Mr. Bates."

Neither of them slept well that night: both were restless, hoping against hope that Green would remain unconscious long enough for him to inhale enough water to drown. Thomas in particular jumped at every noise from downstairs, worrying that Green had somehow survived his ordeal and returned to the house.

"What if he's at breakfast?"

"He won't be," Bates shrugged easily. "He's gone."

**_I hope this satisfies all the cries for vengeance! :p_**


	12. Chapter 12

**_Disclaimer: as you can probably guess, I don't own Downton Abbey_**

Bates, used to rising earlier than most of the inhabitants of Downton, was up, out of bed and dressed long before Thomas the next morning. As he made his way down the corridor, he paused beside the door of Green's room, but couldn't make out any snores or sounds which would indicate that the room was occupied.

He was the first in the servants' hall, although he could hear Grace, the scullery maid, clanging her bucket as she scuttled quickly down the corridor. The door opening onto the courtyard was swinging gently on its hinges, exactly as he and Thomas had left it a few hours before. His mind wandered back to earlier years at Downton, when he had sat at this very table and waited for his first glimpse of Anna as she came downstairs... back then, the thought of living with Anna, waking up with her every morning, had seemed like an impossible dream.

"Mr. Bates?" Mrs. Hughes surprised voice jolted him out of his reverie. "I wasn't expecting to see you down here so early."

"I woke up at my usual time, and couldn't get back to sleep once I was up," he explained easily, judging it best not to mention to Mrs. Hughes that a combination of nervous anticipation and the unfamiliar bed had made it difficult to drop off at all –not to mention that he had missed having Anna sleeping next to him. Mrs. Hughes seemed to guess at part of what he had left unsaid and smiled sympathetically at him.

"I daresay Anna will be down soon in that case," she reassured him before vanishing into the kitchen, as Bates turned sharply at the sound of footsteps coming down the back staircase. Instead of his wife's face, however, he was greeted by Thomas, looking decidedly less arrogant than usual.

"No one else down yet?" Thomas asked.

"Just us," Bates shrugged. "Someone might have come down early and gone out though, the back door was hanging open."

"Blimey, Bates, did we really do it?" Thomas asked, leaning towards Bates and keeping his voice low, although it would have been hard for anyone to overhear.

"Looks like we did," Bates answered, satisfaction flooding through his body at the thought of the hopefully dead visiting valet. "No sign of life in his room at any rate."

"Do you –do you think we've got away with it?"

"I think we have. Just act natural." _Although if anyone at Downton knew about acting natural and deflecting suspicion it would have to be Thomas._

"And if this worked," Bates continued. "Then Anna and I owe you a great debt."

"You'll owe me nothing," Thomas said. "The bastard got what was coming to him." With that, Thomas went into the courtyard for his first cigarette, while Bates settled down to wait for Anna, hoping that the next set of footsteps he could hear coming closer were hers.

He visibly relaxed when he caught a glimpse of blonde hair, and a few seconds later Anna cautiously peered into the room.

"I'm so relieved you're down here already," she said, slipping into her accustomed place at his side. "I was afraid he'd be the first down here." Her voice trailed off at the thought. While Bates was desperate to tell her that Green was gone, would never hurt any woman again, he didn't want to put Anna in the difficult position of having to conceal the truth, at least until Green had been found and removed from the premises.

"He isn't," he soothed her as best he could. "How did you sleep?" Judging from the shadows on her face, she hadn't had managed much more sleep than he had.

"It felt odd being back in my old room," she admitted. "Took me back to the time before we were married, when I wanted nothing more than to sneak into your room, but didn't dare."

"Just as well we never had the courage to try it," he said. Mrs. Hughes and Mr. Carson's wrath if they had caught him or Anna out of their quarters would have been a truly fearsome sight.

xXx

Breakfast began as usual, although as time wore on, more and more people began to shoot enquiring glances at Green's empty chair.

"Is Mr. Green still in bed?" Mr. Carson asked when he couldn't ignore it any more.

"I thought he could have gone for an early morning walk," Thomas suggested. "The back door was open when we came downstairs."

"You think maybe he couldn't sleep again?" Daisy asked, overhearing the last part of the conversation when she walked in with a fresh plate of toast.

"That would seem like the most likely explanation," Carson said. "But just in case, James, would you mind going up to Mr. Green's room to check that he hasn't merely overslept?"

Jimmy pushed back his chair and left the room, stuffing a piece of toast into his mouth and glaring at his plate as if to dare anyone to touch his food while he was gone.

Mrs. Hughes looked at Anna while they waited for Jimmy's return. She looked like she hadn't slept a wink all night, and who could blame her? She had caught the tail end of Anna and Bates' conversation the night before about Anna barricading her door, and she could guess that Anna had done just that. For the first time, Mrs. Hughes wondered what would have happened if Lord Gillingham had invited Lady Mary to his estate instead –what would they have done then? She wouldn't have put it past Mr. Bates to go straight to his Lordship and tell him the whole story in an attempt to prevent Anna, or Lady Mary for that matter, from having to stay in the same house as that evil man.

"No sign of him," Jimmy said as he returned and went back to his toast. "Bed looks like he's been tossing and turning in it, but he's certainly not there now."

"Thomas, you'll have to dress Lord Gillingham this morning," Carson said as the first bell –Lady Grantham's –rang. "Don't alarm him, just tell him his valet must have gone for a walk and lost track of time."

"Wouldn't like to be in Green's shoes then, having to admit to that," Thomas said sarcastically as Lady Mary's bell rang, followed soon afterwards by Lord Grantham's.

"We'll have to organise a search for him if he's not back by the time the family's finished breakfast," Mr. Carson said to Mrs. Hughes as the servants' hall rapidly cleared.

"Oh, he'll turn up," Mrs. Hughes assured him, more confidently than she felt. Mr. Bates couldn't have anything to do with this, could he?

xXx

"Has Mr. Green popped up yet?" Thomas asked as he returned downstairs. "Lord Gillingham's livid!"

"No, he hasn't," Mr. Carson. "I will speak to his Lordship as soon as he's finished breakfast and suggest we organise a search party for him."

"Maybe he ran away in the night," Jimmy shrugged. "Not really our concern, is it?"

"I think you'll find it is our concern, James," Carson said sternly, although deep down he couldn't help agreeing with the footman.

Lord Grantham and Lord Gillingham insisted on joining the search party, composed of themselves, Carson, Branson, Thomas, the footmen and hall boys. Mr. Bates had also volunteered himself, thinking it would arouse suspicion not to, but had been assigned to search the house instead, because of his leg.

"Just in case the old boy was looking for the kitchen but got locked into a linen cupboard instead," Thomas snorted on his way to search the stables with Mr. Branson.

With the men all out searching for Mr. Green, Mrs. Hughes went into her parlour to check her ledgers, taking Anna with her.

"Poor Mr. Green!" they heard Edna exclaim, before Mrs. Hughes shut the door firmly behind them.

"Poor Mr. Green, indeed!" Mrs. Hughes snorted. "They wouldn't be sorry if they knew the truth about him. Whatever fate's befallen him, he more than deserved it."

"What do you think's happened?" Anna asked, not daring to put her fear of Mr. Bates' involvement into words.

"I couldn't say," Mrs. Hughes replied. "For all we know, he's just got lost somewhere on the grounds, or fallen and broken his leg."

"I hope they find him," Anna said. "If they don't, I'll forever think of him as prowling the grounds of Downton."

Although Mrs. Hughes chided Anna for letting her imagination run away with her, she couldn't deny that Anna, of all people, needed a clear ending to this.

"I thought that every sound I heard in the night was him," Anna admitted. "I slept in that room for years, but it never felt as unsafe as it did last night." She wouldn't admit it to Mrs. Hughes, but she'd missed the comfort and safety of having Mr. Bates lying next to her.

They hadn't been in the parlour for long before they heard calls from outside and running footsteps. Mrs. Hughes quickly sent Anna upstairs to see if the ladies needed anything, thinking to spare her whatever sight was unfolding downstairs.

Thomas and Alfred carried Green in, laying him in Carson's pantry while Tom, who had run on ahead, took the car down to the hospital for Dr. Clarkson.

"He's beyond help," Carson shrugged to Mrs. Hughes after the rest of the staff had all been sent off to continue their daily tasks. "He was facedown in the duck pond –must have fallen and lost consciousness."

Although Mrs. Hughes tried to feel sorry for the man, all she felt was a deep relief. Anna could truly put the attack behind her now.

"I'm sure Mr. Bates has gone to tell Anna," Carson said, as though he had read her mind. "Maybe this can bring her and Mr. Bates some closure."

xXx

Bates had indeed gone up to tell Anna, as fast as his legs could carry him, when he saw Thomas and Alfred bring the corpse in.

"You're sure?" Anna asked again, holding on to the doorway of Lady Mary's room, where Bates had found here. "He's really gone?"

"Gone for good," Bates promised. "He won't hurt anyone again."

"How did it happen?"

"We'll know more when Dr. Clarkson arrives, but it looks like he lost consciousness and fell face first into the duck pond. Those sleeping pills Thomas gave him must have been stronger than he expected."

"An unfortunate accident," Dr. Clarkson said when he arrived. "Had he not been walking right past the pond, you would most likely have found him unconscious on the path –it was drowning that killed him, not loss of consciousness. There's no indication of foul play."

Thomas and Bates both heaved sighs of relief at this.

"What will you tell Anna?" Thomas asked, but Bates thought it best not to burden Anna with the knowledge. Better to have her believe that Fate had finally caught up with Green –there was no need for her to know that her husband had had a hand in it too.

**_Just an epilogue to go! Thank you so much for all your reviews, they're part of what made writing this fic so enjoyable (that, and my need for vengeance against Green!) _**


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